The Odds In Favor
by orangeyhairedimmortal
Summary: It's a new Addams' family generation and there are more quirky, ooky, spooky, and cooky adventures to go on. Wednesday is all grown up and has married Joel Glicker, taking over the Addams estate after Gomez's untimely death. With their children following in her footsteps, what happens when Amanda Buckman's son, Bradley becomes the object of October's affection? based on 90's movies
1. Happy Turkey Day

The moon was full and bright, illuminating the night sky as well as the large, dark and gloomy mansion below it. It was also Thanksgiving time, a time to have people come together and conduct camaraderie, food drives, and Black Friday. Except for the people in this particular mansion…

As the people for the food drives came up to the house, knocking on the door, they had no idea that there were people above them, looking down at them.

* * *

"This is my favorite time of year."

"Remember when we met?"

"Of course, I do… I could never forget that day…"

"You had your hair in braids then."

"You were so weak."

"You were so pale in the sunlight."

"You looked so frightened."

"You were so odd…"

"You were so _Jewish_…"

"Mother, Father, can we do it now?"

The two turned as a lovely pale girl looked up at the devoted parents.

"Go ahead, October."

The girl gave a mischievous smirk and picked up a can of green beans. She lightly threw it up and caught it and then pulled back her arm. She looked over at her uncle.

"Are you ready, Uncle Pugsley?"

"I've got the turkey." He said, holding a huge uncooked turkey up.

October's father bent down and picked up a bow and arrow, handing it to his wife.

"To Camp Chipewa."

Wednesday reached into her bosom and grabbed matches, lighting them and then the end of the arrow.

"If Hell was an incarnation, it would be that place."

Joel smirked and let go of his wife as he pulled back the bow.

"To Gary and Becky Granger."

He pulled back the arrow and fired it down to the food drive people below as Pugsley threw the turkey and October threw cans of food at them.

Morticia looked on with a satisfied smile as she knitted in her chair. _Ah… a new Addams generation..._

* * *

**i have always wanted to do an addams family fanfic with wednesday and joel as parents. i will try not to make them just like gomez and morticia but i want the same quirkiness to remain. please be gentle, this is my first out-of-anime fanfic i've ever felt strongly about doing. **


	2. Electric

"My parents may be coming for a visit." Joel said, holding the cigar in his mouth by his teeth in his chair.

Wednesday, who was completing a circuit for the chair he was sitting in for her electrical experiment, sat up and looked at her husband.

"What do you mean?"

"They want to come see the kids. I told them that they shouldn't come but they insisted."

"After what happened with you father at the wedding, I thought they would never come back. I made sure the ant bed was positioned just right for his chair to be right over it and he would disturb the bed… I guess I didn't get the right sort of ants…" she said with a dissatisfied click of her tongue as she went back to the wires on the floor.

"Oh, no, they were the right ones. He went into anaphylactic shock, remember?" Wednesday grinned from where she was on the floor. "But he said that he thinks it was an honest mistake and would like to come and see the kids."

"Well, I haven't fed the Venus fly trap in a while…" she said, standing up and looking down at her husband. "Now, I need you to hold this fork for me."

"What are you doing?" he asked, with a bemused look.

"Well, it's an experiment, my love: is steel a better conductor or you?"

Joel sighed as Wednesday went to the large breaker and held the handle.

"Mother?"

Wednesday frowned and looked over at her daughter.

"Yes, October?"

"What are you doing to Father?"

"Just putting a little spark into the marriage…" she said with a wry smile.

Joel got up from the chair and went over to his daughter.

"What is it, honey?"

"I was wondering if I could go to the graveyard and play with Thing."

"Of course you can. Don't forget to take some salt with you. There are slugs all over your grandfather's grave again."

October smiled, skipping away as Wednesday stared at Joel again.

"Joel, please sit in the chair."

He headed back when the door opened again.

"Mother?"

Wednesday sighed and put her hand on her hip.

"What is it Eingelburt?"

The young boy in the striped shirt and black shorts looked at his mother with large glasses and held up a dead possum.

"I found this in the street. I was wondering if I could go and put this is Mrs. O'Neily's car across the street."

"Eingelburt, I'm surprised at you." Joel said. He put his cigar back in his mouth. "I would put it in the air duct of her house."

Eingelburt grinned and went off to go do what he was going to do. Joel looked at Wednesday and grabbed her around the waist, pulling her close.

"_Mon cher_…"

"Stop it." she said stoically.

He pulled the cigar from his mouth and leaned into her, kissing her on her black covered lips anyway. He had gotten used to his new family's weird and odd ways of doing things. It was hard for him to understand Wednesday at first but after reading between the lines, he knew that there was a love there that only he could see. He was glad he was the special person to see in between her stoic nature and snarky sarcasm. After kissing her for a moment, he pulled back and then began to kiss her down into her bosom, where a small trap let loose on his lip.

He pulled back quickly and pulled the trap off, making a face at Wednesday. She shrugged.

"A booby trap…" he said, looking at the tiny trap. "I love the surprises you give me..."

Wednesday hadn't wanted to be with Joel but after he survived her first time of scaring him to death, she began to respect him more as a man as well as fitting into her family. It didn't take him long (to her surprise) to adjust to the Addams' way of thinking. Though he told them 'no séances', much to Grandmama's dismay, but she got him back with a potion of her own. When he proposed to her in the morgue of the hospital where Gomez had spent his last days, she knew he was the one for her. She had hoped for a cemetery but the morgue was a little more formal… and fresher.

"So when do your parents intend on coming?"

"This weekend."

"I'll make sure Mother makes Uncle Nick-Nack's vegetable soup." She said, heading toward the kitchen.

"Make sure Uncle Nick-Nack isn't in it this time!" Joel called out, sitting down in his chair and yelling.

He stood back up and found tacks sticking in his backside.

Wednesday only smiled on the stairwell, knowing her trick was done since he wouldn't stay still for the electrocution.

* * *

A couple days later as October sat in school, messing with her pen as she teacher rambled on about something when the door opened. The sudden quietness of her teacher made October look up.

"Class, I would like you to meet Bradley Buckman-Smythe; he'll be your new student as of today."

"Hey, nice to meet you all." He said with a wave.

October blinked and gripped her pen. _Blonde hair, great personality, tucked in shirt… the Devil._

"I'm sorry but we only have seats in the back. You can take whichever one you want." The teacher said, pointing.

October gripped the pen harder, looking at the back row. No one wanted to be friends with her, which she liked, and so the whole back row was available but there were two seats that were not next to her and two that were. She hoped this… demon, would pick one of those.

Luck was not with her.

Bradley sat next to the pale girl with two ponytails, like a girl from a horror movie, but his mother had always told him to make friends with everyone. He leaned over, holding out his hand.

"Hi, I'm Bradley, what's your name?"

October just looked at him with her eyes narrowed and took the pen she was gripping and slammed it into her notebook, the ink straw flying out the back of the pen from the force.

Bradley pulled his hand back and gulped. _What have I gotten myself into?_

October turned rigidly back to the front. _Spirits of darkness, help me._

* * *

**this is harder than i expected but luckily i have a pretty twisted mind so it's a little easier. it's just hard not to make people other people by default. i wanted to keep wednesday's nature there which is why she likes to play tricks on her husband. joel is more of the romantic in the relationship. i also wanted wednesday's electric chair brought back into the picture. i'll have the guillotine there too. oh and their son's name was just a name i thought would fit the family... it's kinda eclectic sounding**


	3. Krampus Gifts

**unlike before, i havent' watched the addams family in a bit so i do hope it's still the same quality. it's difficult to get the right quirkiness so please forgive!**

* * *

"How was school today, October?" Joel asked as Morticia served dinner to him.

"All was well until a golden Devil appeared in the classroom and sat next to me."

"Oh, did you win something?" Wednesday asked, sipping the strange soup in her plate.

"No, Mother. It was a boy with blonde hair and blue eyes."

Wednesday blinked at her daughter.

"His family must be having troubles. Remember how Pubert got that when Uncle Fester left us for Debbie?" Wednesday asked Pugsley, who was sitting next to Eingelbert.

Pugsley looked up and nodded. "Yeah, it was pretty gross."

"So he's been afflicted with a disease?" October asked, curious.

"Not necessarily." Joel said, making a face at his wife. "He may just have blonde hair and blue eyes like other people."

"Well if he's diseased I would like to help him."

"Look what you did, Wednesday, you made her think he's got something."

Wednesday looked at Joel without expression until he got uncomfortable and then she turned back to her daughter.

"What's the diseased boy's name?"

"A revolting name, Mother, I can barely stand to tell it to you… It's Bradley Buckman-Smythe."

Wednesday dropped her fork in surprise.

"_Two_ last names?! Joel, we must let her transfer classes."

Joel sighed. "Wednesday, she won't get anything from him."

"Those with two last names are considered quite rich, mind you." Morticia said. "They can influence all sorts of people. Those are the ones to watch out for."

"You must ask to switch desks at once when you get back to school. No daughter of mine will sit next to a two-namer."

"You said Buckman? Wasn't that one girl at camp named Buckman?" Joel asked, putting his cigar in his mouth. "I remember tying someone up with that name…"

"The Pilgrim Sarah Miller." Wednesday said, picking up her fork.

"Isn't that the name of your book, Mother?" Eingelburt said, looking up at her.

Wednesday nodded. "Yes. How the Pilgrims should have been treated and what it would be like if Native Americans hadn't been suckered into small pox blankets. My best seller…"

"So tragically charming." Morticia said with a small smile.

"So, what should I do about Bradley?"

"You stay away from him and if you can't, at least try to cure him. No daughter of mine will be affected by a two-namer, a blonde one at that."

"I can give you a list of spells to help the poor boy."

"Thank, Grandmama."

_Yes! Spells!_

* * *

"Anyone know the answer to number four? October?"

October looked at the question in regards to the story of Saint Nicholas. She frowned at the jolly fat man depicted on the page and looked at the teacher.

"I can't answer that. I don't believe in Santa Claus."

"Well, no one else here does either, October, but this is in regards to Saint Nicholas, the originator of the modern Santa Claus."

"I told you, I don't believe in Santa Claus. I believe in the Krampus."

"The what?" the teacher said, taken off guard.

"The Krampus. He took the bad children to Hell on Christmas."

The class began to look at each other and murmur about October's proclamation and the teacher made the class quiet down.

"Alright then, Ms. Addams, please tell the class about this Krampus thing. I'd like to know more about it as well."

October moved her mouth to the side, not expecting to get much backup on the creature, but she didn't mind telling the idiots in her class about Krampus.

"Krampus is said to actually be a companion of Saint Nicholas and is a furred beast. He looks more like a goat with a scary face, sharp teeth and claws, and large horns sticking up from his face. While your Saint Nicholas was giving out gifts to the lovely children, he was directed Krampus to eat the others. And so, at night, while everyone was sleeping, children would be taken and thrown in sacks to be judged in the underworld."

"That's so scary! Why do you have to be so weird?" a girl said, looking at October.

"Why do you have to be so stupid?"

"Girls… Thank you, October, for that… uh… _lovely_ explanation of a Krampus."

October sat down and went back to doodling in her notebook when she felt someone tap her on the shoulder. She looked over as Bradley stared at her. She narrowed her eyes at him and pulled away.

"What?"

"That was pretty cool about the Krampus thing. I never knew that."

"That doesn't surprise me."

"Could you explain it more to me at lunch or something?"

"Can you explain why you think I want to talk to you?"

Bradley was a little taken aback by the harshness of October's words but put on his brave face and leaned toward her.

"My mother always told me to be nice to everyone… even weird pale freaks like you."

Though the words kind of stung, October didn't miss a beat.

"I was told to cast a spells on people who annoy me." She said stoically. "You wanna hear one?"

"No thanks."

"Then stop annoying me."

* * *

Bradley went home and dropped his backpack in the walkway of the house. Going to the kitchen to get a snack, he leaned against the counter and thought about October. She was such an odd girl but she intrigued him. He'd never heard of that crumpet thing. He went over to his laptop and typed in the word, reading about it. He wondered what kind of stuff she liked… It seemed like macabre and torturous stuff mostly…

"Bradley, is that you?"

"Yeah, Mom, it's me."

Amanda walked in and made a face at him, putting her hands on her hips.

"What are you reading?"

"Hmm? Oh, I'm reading about this thing called a Krampus. A girl in school told the class about it."

Amanda leaned across the couch to look at the article.

"What a gruesome creature. Was it for a report?"

"No, she told the teacher she didn't believe in Santa Claus and believed in the Krampus. She's really weird."

"Now, now, Bradley, we shouldn't make fun."

"I'm not being mean, Mom, it's just that she really is weird. She's as pale as a ghost with black hair and deep black eyes. She hates my guts and even threatened to put a spell on me today!"

Bradley's mother stopped in her tracks.

"A spell?"

"Yeah!"

"What is this girl's name?"

"Uh… October Addams."

Amanda made a face and leaned over the couch again, pulling the laptop shut.

"What did you do that for?!"

"Listen to me, Bradley, and listen well." She said, coming around the couch. "You know that book that I told you not to read? It was called The Pilgrim Sarah Miller?"

"Yeah, you said it was a porno book or something."

"Well, I lied about that, dear… You see, that book is actually about me and the character I played in a small play at an old camp called Camp Chipewa."

"Oh, you've talked about that place before. You and Dad used to go to it before it burnt down."

"Yes, well, the reason Camp Chipewa is no longer there is because this girl that you're sitting by, her mother burnt it down."

Bradley gave his mother a 'get real' look.

"Mom, just because she's weird and has the same last name as the author doesn't mean they are related."

"I'm telling you the truth. Wednesday Addams burnt Camp Chipewa to the ground and… and I was there. Where do you think I got these scars on my wrists from? That was from where I was trying to untie myself from a beam that I was tied too. That bitch put an apple in my mouth and then lit a match right in front of me, setting the kindling on fire under my feet! I didn't want you to have that book in the house and see what she had made of my humiliation and fears."

Bradley made a face at his mother again.

"Mom, it's just a coincidence, I'm telling you. I mean, seriously, the girl said she was going to put a spell on me. Like _that's_ for real…"

Bradley got up to put his backpack away before Amanda yelled at him when he saw a small piece of paper in his cup holder. He pulled it out and read the small note outloud.

"_Ad nigrum flavo, et loqueris ad pharmacopolam; a prima luce usque ad vesperam._ Huh… Someone must have accidentally stuck their Latin stuff in my bag. I'll take it tomorrow to give back."

He stuffed it back in his backpack and hummed on the way up the stairs.

* * *

**uh oh, it looks like someone slipped a little gift of their own into his backpack. idiot, everyone knows that if someone threatens you with a curse, most curses are in latin because it's the old language... so good job bradley. just like his mother haha**

**and i just found out about krampus from, ironically, a soap opera my nana was watching. i think that that would be something the addams' would take great delight in**


	4. As The Day Is Long

**just and fyi: you must read the glickers like how they talked in the movie or it's not gonna make sense**. **and the latin actually doesn't say that so yeah...**

* * *

Bradley woke up and yawned, getting up and going to the bathroom to do his morning routine. As he lazily went to the bathroom, he scratched his head and then turned to go into the bathroom. When he looked at the mirror, he had to do a double take and then looked behind him. He made a face and then looked back at the mirror. He realized that it was him in the mirror and then screamed but it wasn't a scream.

"Quack." He said, trying to say his name.

He gasped and looked at the mirror closer, his now black hair very unlike him. He tried to speak again but all that came out was another quack. He didn't know what to do at all! Why was he quacking? Why was his hair black? What was going _on_? He breathed in and then remembered the paper he had found in his pocket. He quickly ran out and grabbed the paper and then turned on his laptop, going to a translation site to see exactly what the paper said.

When the sentence translated, he turned his head at the sentence.

_'Yellow to black people, and speak to the pharmacy; from morning to evening'? What in the world does **that** mean?!_

"Bradley, are you up?"

Bradley went to say 'yes' but a loud quack came out instead and he slapped his hands over his mouth.

"Bradley? What in the world was that noise?"

He looked around frantically, trying to figure out what he could use to talk to his mother without opening his mouth. It finally dawned on him to text her and he sent the message. He quickly got ready for school, throwing a beanie onto is head immediately when Amanda walked in, looking concerned.

"Brad, what's going on? Why did you text me?"

Bradley grabbed his phone and texted her again. She looked at it and frowned.

"You can't speak? Why?" Bradley shrugged. "I think we should take you to the doctor."

He shook his head firmly and texted her again. She read it and then sighed, pushing her blonde hair back behind her ear.

"Alright then… And why are you wearing a hat? It's not that cold out today…"

Bradley shrugged and grabbed his wallet, throwing it in his pants pocket. He kissed Amanda on the cheek and headed out of the house.

* * *

Lurch drove the family car up to the school and stopped it. Joel let out a puff of smoke from his cigar and then placed it back between his teeth.

"Don't forget that your grandparents are coming to the house this weekend. Remember, no bats this time."

"Aw, Father…" October said with a small pout. "I thought it was funny."

"Well, your grandmother didn't and you know who gets chewed out? Me… They're too afraid of your mother to say anything to her." Joel said with a frown.

October sighed. "Alright then… what about spiders?"

"What kind of spider?" he said, pushing his glasses up.

"A tarantula."

"Poisonous?"

"Not… really…"

Joel thought for a moment. "Where?"

"The bed, of course!" she said like it was obvious.

"Fine, that will do. But only once."

October smirked and then kissed her father on the cheek. Lurch pulled away and October turned to go inside when she was grabbed by someone and pulled away from the sidewalk.

"I don't believe in kidnapping until after the first date." She growled, turning around.

Bradley blinked at her in confusion. He shook his head, ignoring her statement and then typed something into his phone.

**What the hell did you do to me?**

October read the message and then lifted a black eyebrow.

"Whatever do you mean?"

Bradley pulled the paper from his pocket and shoved it in her face. She took it and then her other eyebrow went up.

"What of it?"

**What does it mean?**

October handed it back to him. "I'm not taking Latin."

**I know it was you! You threatened me yesterday with a spell and I'm not so stupid to not know that most spells are in Latin.**

"But you _are_ stupid enough to read it out loud?"

Bradley glared at her for a moment but she had a valid point. He clenched his fist and typed more.

**Fix it.**

"Can't. It has to pass on its own."

**How long will that be?**

"Who knows? It could be forever…" she said, walking away from him.

He was so frustrated that he let out a stream of curse words… only they were loud quacks. October had to keep herself from dying on the way to class. _I can't believe that idiot read it out loud!_

* * *

All day, Bradley glared at October. They didn't have many classes together but whenever she went to them, he would be there, glaring. When she walked out of the cafeteria, he was glaring at her then too. It didn't matter where she was, if he could be in eye line of her, he was most likely glaring at her.

Finally, the last class of the day came, the one where they sat next to each other. October came in a little later than usual and found a note on her desk. She lifted an eyebrow and sat down, opening it. It was from Bradley and it hurt her to even look at his perfect handwriting but she read the note anyway.

_October,_

_I'll find my own curse and inflict it on you. I have the Internet. I know it was you who slipped that note to me. Don't mess with me because you don't know who you're dealing with._

She put her lips to the side and then crumbled the note. She chucked it at Bradley's head as hard as she could and he looked at her but she was paying attention to the teacher, trying to look innocent. Bradley knew that October Addams was anything but.

* * *

When October got home, she saw the Buick in the driveway and groaned on the inside.

"What's wrong?" Wednesday asked.

"Grandfather and Grandmother are here."

"I understand the pain." Wednesday said, flipping the page of the arrest book that she was looking at. She made a face. "Oh…"

"What is it?"

"They caught the peeping tom." She said with a sigh. "I'll miss him."

"Mother?"

"Yes?"

"How did you know you liked Father?"

"When he said he'd die if his mother used fabric softener." She looked up and smirked a little. "It was cute to think of that. Why do you ask?"

"I was just wondering… Did you feel anything when that happened?"

"That butterfly feeling only happens if you eat caterpillars, October."

"I meant was there any other feelings? Like… satisfaction or were you anxious or anything?"

Wednesday looked at her daughter as the car finally stopped.

"This sounds like a conversation you should have with your father. He knows more about that romance stuff than I do."

They got out of the car and October followed her mother inside the slightly renovated Addams home.

* * *

"Look at thes! Dust everywheya. Do you eva dust, Joel? Or does it mess up ya allagies like evereya theng else? Es that why ya look like ya belong in a Mariachi band?"

"No, Ma, I grew my mustache because Wednesday likes it that way."

"Are ya shoowa she didn't draw it on theya with a marka? If I licked it, would it rub ooff?" Mrs. Glicker said, licking her thumb and going toward Joel.

The knight in the foyer's axe suddenly came down between the two of them and Mrs. Glicker gasped, stepping back as a small giggle let out. Joel smiled and looked behind the knight to see Eingelbert. He motioned for him to come out and he stood beside his father.

"Oh jus look at hem! He's grown so much since I last saw hem. Do ya rememba me?"

Eingelbert nodded as the door opened and Wednesday and October walked in.

"Oh, theya ya are, sweethooart. I was jus about to ask Joel wheya ya were."

"Good to see you, as always." Wednesday said with a small nod to her mother-in-law.

"Come heya and give me a hug! I haven't seen ya in foreva!" Mrs. Glicker said, going up to Wednesday, who stepped back.

"I don't hug." She said stoically.

Mrs. Glicker put her arms down and looked at Joel.

"What's this now? How come ya wife doesn't hug? We hug, you hug, why can't she hug?"

"Ma, she doesn't like it. She doesn't even hug _me _and I'm her husband."

"Then how do you two do anytheng romantic?" she asked, making a face at them.

"Oh, we're all kinds of romantic." Joel said, setting the record straight.

"And how can ya be if ya wife don't hug?"

"I make him scream. That's my joy." Wednesday said, crossing her arms over her black leather bustier.

"Wenz…" Joel said with a face to her.

"What? She asked."

"You make him scream? Why would you want that?"

"Because it gives me pleasure."

"But what about hem? Does it give _hem_ pleasure? Do ya eva think about Joel?"

"Only when I remember he's there."

"Where's Grandfather?" October asked, wanting to get to another topic.

"He's unpacking the clothes. Oh, I didn't even see you theya, Octy. Ya look beautiful, like ya motha. The light reflects ooff of ya just the same."

October smiled and looked up at her mother, who was giving the Glickers the same disgusted look she usually gave them.

"We're going to take you to a nice bistro tonight, Ma." Joel said, grabbing her by the arm to escort her. "I think you'll like it."

"Will they have a brisket? Ya fatha can't have that fancy stuff…"

October looked at her mother and Wednesday walked in the opposite direction.

"Where are you going?" October asked.

"To get the bats."

"Father said no bats… I'm doing a spider later."

"Bats are a must, my sweet." Her mother said, ascending he stairs.

* * *

**so can bradley pull off something like this for october? and mrs. glicker makes me giggle. i hope i got her alright and wednesday doesn't wear the traditional morticia dress but more like leather bustier and pants with boots and her hair pulled to the side in a large braid. she only wears the dress on dates**


	5. The Bistro

That night, Bradley looked up all sorts of things to try and use on October. Nothing sounded good and a lot of them were kind of harsh. She didn't hurt him or anything, just made his life a little hectic so he didn't want anything bad to happen to her. There was a knock on the door and he turned around as Amanda walked in.

"How are you feeling?"

**Fine. What's up?** he texted.

"Your father is taking us to a bistro that he heard about from some colleagues of his. Will you be okay with going or do you need to stay home?"

Bradley thought for a moment and then grabbed his phone.

**I should be okay. I just won't be able to say anything… and I have to wear this beanie.**

"But why? Is your hair falling out?"

Bradley smiled.** No… Just trust me, please?**

"Alright… well it's a fancy place so if you can make that hat work with nice dress clothes…"

Bradley nodded and then sighed, putting his head on the keyboard. He didn't know what to do! He kept quacking like a duck and his hair was pitch black! How was he supposed to do anything? How long would it last? _Why me?_ he thought to himself.

* * *

Eingelburt and October were on the roof, using two torches on the metal banister surrounding the top patio.

"How long do you think it will take to get Grandma and Grandpa out of the house?"

"Last time just the bats did it but I'm putting a spider in the bed tonight and Mother said she was going to use bats so… I hope maybe a day?"

"Yeah… I don't like how she pinches my cheeks all the time and they're kind of cheap."

"Yup…" She wiggled the bar a little bit and looked at her brother. "I think mine's thin enough, yours?"

"Yeah."

"Good… Hey, Grandpa?! Can you come up here? There's a great view from the top of the house to the lake!"

* * *

Wednesday undid her braid and let her hair hang down. It came to the middle of her back, not as long as her mother's was but close enough. She slipped on her mother's old black dress and went to the closet to find some shoes. Joel walked in, tying his tie and smiled at her as she searched for shoes.

"From behind it's like looking at Mrs. Addams. It's a little scary."

"Then don't think about my mother that way." She said, standing up and putting her shoes on the bed. "Besides, it _was_ her dress…"

Joel smirked and went to the closet to get his jacket.

"Do you think Mom and Dad will like the bistro?"

"I have my doubts."

Joel went to the window and opened it up, looking out toward town. He looked down and realized that the safety net wasn't out and cranked the net out to its full capacity.

"Wednesday, did you pull in the safety net that's around the top part of the house?"

"Maybe."

The sound of screaming caught his attention when suddenly his father landed in the net and Joel yelled, flying back.

"DAD!"

Mr. Glicker moaned for a second and got out of the net, climbing into Joel's bedroom. He leaned on his knees as Joel went back to the window and looked up to see what had happened.

"Dad, what's going on? We jump off of the roof every other month."

"Your children are from the Devil."

"Yes, I paid him handsomely." Wednesday said, sitting at her vanity to put makeup on.

"Aw, Dad, they were just having fun."

"Fun? _Fun_?! Fun is playing piggybacks or a board game! Falling to your doom is _not fun_."

"You got caught by the safety net!"

"Unfortunately." Wednesday mumbled.

"See?! See?! This is exactly what your mother and I didn't want for you. How can you be happy living with this stoic woman and children who act like little imps? You should have married a nice Jewish girl and things would have been perfect."

"But I didn't want to marry Esther, I wanted to marry Wednesday. I love Wednesday and she loves me. Right?"

"On occasion." She said, putting black lipstick on.

"See?"

"See _what_? Joel, she doesn't care for you at all."

Wednesday finished her makeup and then got up, walking out of the room and Mr. Glicker looked at his son, putting his hands on his shoulders.

"Joel, why would you do this to yourself? She's a loveable as a wall… why?"

Joel lit a cigar in his father's face and blew smoke into it for good measure.

"You don't know Wednesday Addams like I do. She's got her quirks but if not her quirks, I wouldn't love her. And she _does_ love me, but she loves me like an Addams, not a Glicker. I would like for us to have a good time, Dad, so if you could keep your opinions to yourself about my wife and children, I'd greatly appreciate it."

He walked away and breathed in deep, the first time ever facing his father so harshly. When he walked out, he was grabbed into a hallway and saw Wednesday was there.

"Wenz."

"You were like an animal, trapped and confused. It excited me…"

"I do have to ask if you ever did love me, like really love me."

"If I didn't have affection for you, I wouldn't have married you. Addams' aren't known for their stupidity, just their oddities. Now… I would like it if you would give me the pleasure of taming your animal."

Joel grinned. "Whip or handcuffs this time?"

"I was thinking something a little bit different… but it will have to be after dinner. Pugsley is going to set it up for me with Thing's help."

"Does it have to do with electricity?"

"No… the circuits wouldn't be able to take what I would like to do to you."

"Hmm… Are you sure? Debbie left that electrocution ring down in the basement right?"

"Uncle Fester sold it except one for Dementia as a wedding present. I think Flora and Fauna took two and Cousin It took one as well." She sighed. "What I could have done to you in that room."

"Well, I'm anticipating what you have in store tonight."

Wednesday smirked and squeezed his cheeks together.

* * *

"Matthew, what is this place?" Amanda asked as they looked around at the rock interior of the strange bistro.

"I… I honestly don't know. I thought this was a regular bistro but I guess it's something different. Do you want to go?"

"No… it might have some lovely dishes to choose from. Let's just take a look and see if we like anything."

Bradley looked around and thought about October, thinking that this was a place for her.

"Do they have brisket here?"

"No, Dad, they don't have brisket. This is a fancy bistro so please don't embarrass me."

"Don't tell ya fatha what ta do. You dragged hem to thes ooundaground cave dwelling so he can ask all the questions he wants."

Bradley looked over at the table that seemed to have the loudest people and did a double take. Two pale girls were sitting there, one older and the other looked just like October.

"Octy, will ya please get a waiter for us? I don't wanna be hea that long."

"I'm sorry, Grandma, but we have to wait for them."

"The service is horrible already."

Bradley watched as the girl sighed and looked away and his eyes widened when it was who he thought it was. He got up without warning and headed across the bistro to October's table.

* * *

As her grandparents fought with her father, October looked up and saw Bradley walking toward her table.

"Mother, there is the two-namer from my class."

Wednesday looked over and lifted an eyebrow.

"Oh?" She looked around Bradley and saw Amanda sitting there and couldn't resist. "I think I'll have a chat with his parents."

October was going to say something but Wednesday was already gone as Bradley walked up. She crossed her arms when he held out is phone to her. She tried to ignore it but he urged her to take it. She took it and read over it.

**Your mother wrote a book called "The Pilgrim Sarah Miller" right?**

"Yeah…"

He typed on his phone again and held it out.

**Will you let me borrow it?**

October blinked when a scream let out and the two looked over as Amanda stared at Wednesday, who was walking toward her with one of the candles in hand.

Bradley held out his phone to October.

**You wanna go get some McDonald's with me?**

* * *

**so yeah... wenz and amanda finally meet haha. and trying to make the kids devious is harder than usual. and wenz does love joel but she of course loves him in her own little twisted way and that's why she let him know that she had something in store for him later and he knows that. that loyalty!**


	6. Ordering

**let me just say this was a little harder than i expected. pls be a little gentle.**

* * *

October looked up at Bradley and blinked at him.

"You must be joking?"

**I assure you, I'm not. Our parents look like they will fight.** he said, holding the phone out.

October looked over at where Amanda had grabbed a fork and was holding it toward Wednesday.

"Your mother is a wimp."

**Yeah well, your mother scared the shit out of her at that camp. Come on, Mccy D's is across the way. Maybe you can take this curse off me, yah?**

"Nice try… What's a McDonald anyway? Does the farmer own it?"

**What farmer?**

"That stupid nursery rhyme parents sing as if children care about an old man making a living."

Bradley couldn't keep himself from laughing and then he laughed (embarrassed) that he sounded like Donald Duck laughing because of him having to talk like a duck. October watched him and he finally calmed down.

**No way! This is a different place altogether… Come on and I'll show you.**

October didn't really want to go anywhere with the two-namer but she saw that things were going from bad to worse between their mothers and Joel was trying to convince his parents not to get up and leave since they didn't see any brisket on the menu. She looked over at Eingelbert but he seems enthralled with the fight between her father and grandparents and decided that things might be easier at the farmer's restaurant.

"Fine…"

Bradley nodded and they left the bistro.

* * *

"I didn't think a farmer would have such an odd mascot for his restaurant. The farmer must have a secretly demented soul as to think children _enjoy_ such things as these."

Bradley lifted an eyebrow. **That's Ronald McDonald.**

"Ronald you say? I didn't think the farmer had a name… I don't recall a mention of him dressing like such a ridiculous bedtime clown in that silly prattle you people call a nursery rhyme."

**I told you that this place has nothing to do with that.**

October wasn't so sure but made a face at the clown and was dragged into McDonald's. She looked around and made a disgusted face at where she was.

"I would not have expected this from you. I'm actually flattered."

**What?**

"I was a little confused at first but now I understand. This is a place where demented clowns serve children." She said as she nodded her head.

Bradley pursed his lips together angrily and tapped on his phone quite hard in agitation.

**For the last time, there are no demented clowns! I'm not even sure how to take that response because it could go two ways… It's not the best but it's better than what was going on over at the bistro. I want the #5 with a coke.**

"Do I count to five and ask?"

**Pick a number and they give you food. Hurry, I'm starving.**

He pushed October up to the register and the lady looked at her weird.

"Halloween is two months from now, you know that right?"

"Yes, I'm preparing for it in advance. Do you enjoy All Hallow's Eve as well?"

"I don't know what that is but you should really hold off on the makeup until then."

October lifted a black eyebrow and pointed to the menu.

"I want the fifth order and a soda. Give it to me."

The girl blinked as October did the same.

"Is that it?" she said with a frown.

"What type of children do you serve exactly?"

"Uh, all kinds? What are you getting at?"

"Well, I see your demented clown but I don't see any children on the menu. I assume the clown gives this grease soaked food to the children before devouring them, right?"

"That'll be $7.75, you freak." The lady growled.

October turned to Bradley. "I assume you brought money."

Bradley rolled his eyes but pulled out a ten and handed it to her. She gave it to the lady and got the change as she was given a cup. October looked at it and then looked at the cashier.

"There is nothing in the cup. Are you that ignorant that you cannot fill this container with liquid?"

"Listen, weirdo, I've been here since four this morning because a coworker decided to skip out on their evening shift. I don't have time to deal with sketchy people like you. You get the drinks over there," she said, pointing. "And you wait for your order."

October took the cup and walked over to Bradley.

**What was that about?**

"She is upset because she is working. She called me a weirdo and a freak. As much as I like the atmosphere of this place, I don't' think I will ever come here again."

Bradley made a face as he went to get his drink and looked back at October, who had sat down. She seemed upset and he set his jaw, putting the lid on the cup. He sat across from her and typed on his phone.

**I'm sorry she called you those names.**

"It's nothing, I'm used to it. My family isn't exactly the most normal. Father is more normal than Mother but…"

Bradley was more surprised that October was showing any emotion at all than that there was possibly one sane person in her household. He could see she was very upset about what the woman called her and when his food was ready, he went up to the counter to get it.

"Oh, this was for you? Is that your girlfriend?"

Bradley pointed to his mouth and shook his head to let her know he couldn't speak but smiled his winning grin and handed her a piece of paper into her hand. Thinking it was his number, she quickly opened the paper only to find what seemed like gibberish on it.

"_Ad nigrum flavo, et loqueris ad pharmacopolam_? What's this supposed to be? Maybe it's a love note?"

Bradley just smirked and put his tray on the table. As a thought, he tried talking but it only made a quacking noise, startling October from her thoughts.

**Sorry… By the way, don't worry about that girl. I took care of it.**

"Took care of what?"

He ignored her and began to eat his sandwich, feeling accomplished.

* * *

"I have to say that the bistro was perfect tonight." Wednesday said as she let her dress fall about her ankles. "It was the most fun I've had in a long time."

"I'm sure Amanda Buckman's presence was part of that?"

"Indeed… I was unhappily surprised, though, to see October with that two-namer."

"His name is Bradley and he seemed nice enough."

"You were nice too."

"I'm demented."

"I made you that way."

Joel laughed. "That's very true. I would have never taken my parents to that bistro before I met you… That reminds me, wasn't there something you wanted to do to me tonight?"

Wednesday smiled and let her hair down from her braid.

"That's right, I owe you something devilish, don't I?"

"Indeed. What was this special thing you had in mind?"

Wednesday walked over to the window and pulled in a small Venus fly trap and stood next to him in just her bra and panties. Joel lifted an eyebrow.

"Kinky…"

"What do you mean? I was just pulling these in from the chill."

"Oh…" Joel looked away as he lit his cigar.

They suddenly heard a yell and they both turned to the door.

"What's ya problem?" Mrs. Glicker growled.

"I don't know, something is crawling... AAAAHHHHH!"

"October's spider was a nice touch." Wednesday said, pulling out handcuffs. "_Now_ I will show you what I have in store."

* * *

**even though october is wednesday's daughter she is also joel's which means she does have a bit of normal human feelings like getting upset when someone calls her a freak and such. and no one would ever be that rude to a customer and get away with it. ah well, she'll get what's coming.**


	7. Darkness

**i had begging so i thought i'd update. ****i didn't think this little fic would be so popular. i hope this works out to the quirkiness since it's been a while. **

* * *

"I don't ever want to go near a place like that ever again, Matthew. Do you hear me? And you! You ran off somewhere." Amanda growled, turning to Bradley.

"I-" He gasped, happy his voice was back. "I just went to McDonald's next door, that's all."

"Oh, good, you're talking again."

"Yeah, looks like it."

Bradley ignored his parents talking in the front seat as he pondered all that had happened that night. Although October's mother scaring his half to death was kind of funny, he weirdest thing about the night was that October had feelings. Not that he didn't think she did, but he thought for a while that she was a stoic bitch. Seeing her saddened by what the woman had said made him see October in a new kind of light. Although she was a little cooky and quirky, she was somehow delightful. She was a good, strange breath of fresh air for Bradley.

"I can't believe Glicker _actually_ married her and they produced a new breed." Matthew said. "I remember him when he was the odd man out at camp."

"He didn't seem too bad." Bradley said from the backseat.

"_He's_ not the problem. It's that family he married into. Bradley," Amanda turned to him and looked at him gravely, her blue eyes staring into his. "I want you to stay away from them. They're evil people."

"They seem more like the type to not hold anything back."

"How do you mean?" Matthew asked his son.

"Well… Take for instance, Mom and the Camp Chipewa thing. You got on Mrs. Glicker's nerves so she waited for the right moment to attack, so to say. They were forced to do things they didn't want by both family and the camp councilors, so they got rid of the camp. They seem more… absolute about things."

"Do we need to take you back to private school?" Amanda asked.

"What? No, why?"

"What your mother is saying, is that there is no excuse for what happened to good ole Chipewa. Technically, they committed at least three or four serious charges. Arson, stolen property, attempted murder, driving without a license…"

Bradley lifted his eyebrow at that one.

"No matter. No son of mine will be around an Addams."

Bradley crossed his arms in the back of the Buick and sighed. _Good thing I didn't tell them I sit beside her everyday._

* * *

Wednesday sipped some tea as she watched the Glickers throw their bags into the back of their car. Joel was talking to them but whatever he was saying, it looked like they were going to have no part of it. Mrs. Glicker turned to her son and was saying something, pointing at him. They all looked up at Wednesday in the window and she lifted her cup as a farewell. Mrs. Glicker spun around and the two climbed into the car. If the two had turned around, they would have seen Wednesday grin for the first time in decades, her white smile reflected in the moonlight.

* * *

The next day, Bradley was startled by a book being slammed onto his desk. He looked up as October looked down at him.

"You requested to read this."

Bradley looked at it and saw that it was The Pilgrim Sarah Miller and looked over at October as she sat down.

"Thanks… You look tired."

"I was up all night."

"Looking for this?" he asked, holding up the book.

"What? No, I was oiling the stairs."

"Oiling the… stairs?"

"Yes."

"…What for?"

"To oil them, of course."

"But why in the middle of the night?"

"To make them slippery."

"Wouldn't that make someone fall and break their neck?"

"That _is_ the idea."

Bradley blinked. "Why would you want to do that?"

"Well, trying to get my grandparents out of the house takes a bit of ingenuity. We tried bats, a tarantula, having Grandfather fall off the roof… Oiling the stairs seemed to do the trick and they left in the middle of the night."

"Wait, were you trying to _kill_ your grandparents?"

"Of course not, that would be extreme."

Bradley made a face of confusion at her.

"I'm a little confused."

"As you would be. That reminds me, have you been cursed since you were born or did it happen recently?"

"Huh?"

"Blonde hair, blue eyes, dimples. You're obviously cursed."

"Wh- No! People naturally have this hair and eye coloring, you know."

"Hmm..."

Bradley made a face when the bell rang and he delved into the book he was given.

By the time lunch was around, Bradley couldn't put the book down. It was _amazing_! He would have never suspected that October's mother could make such an awesome story and the fact that his own mother was part of the masterpiece…

"I'm surprised you like it." October asked, walking to his table.

"This is awesome! Have you read it?"

"Yes."

"Your mom is a great author."

"She's is working on another called **Black Widow Lover**, it's about her babysitter when she was younger."

"You guys are… odd."

"We get that a lot."

Bradley closed the book and looked at her as she sat down.

"Why are you like that? I mean, what makes you guys so demented?"

"I wouldn't say demented, more like boundless."

"Boundless?"

"Why waste life trying to be something you are not? What difference will it make in the world? If I am strange but I'm not hurting anyone, then why can't I be strange? I don't want to come here and be like you, two-namer, flaunting my status to make people think I'm happy."

Bradley frowned. "What makes you think I'm not?"

"I sense something in you. You are odder than you think."

"And what proof do you have?"

"Why haven't you taken your hat off?"

"Huh?"

"The spell is done. So, why do you have it on?"

"I got used to it, I guess."

"You don't get used to a hat that quickly." October reached over the table and snatched it off. "It's because even though the spell is gone, your hair hasn't turned back."

"What of it? Maybe I liked it and did it myself."

"You have a darkness in you that needs to be recognized."

October smiled and it was genuine. She leaned over and surprised Bradley with a kiss on the cheek.

"Although a two-namer, your darkness is appealing to me. I plan to _harvest_ it." she whispered into his ear.

With that, she left, leaving Bradley dumbfounded and slightly turned on.

* * *

**sorry it's not that long. but it looks like there is a sort of darkness in our young bradley just like there was in joel. will october be able to harvest it? the question is more or less: is she like her mother or her father?**


	8. Be Engarde

After October told Bradley that he had a darkness in him, he had wondered about it ever since. He finished Wednesday's book and gave it back to October but other than that, the two hadn't talked. Bradley had been thinking about what October had said and didn't want to be bothered with anything. He didn't talk to October or any of his other friends, just thinking about what she could mean by saying he had a darkness. He finally showed Amanda his hair and she made a fuss about it but eventually got used to it. Eventually, he decided that he needed to get a little clarity or at least figure himself out and so he made a resolve.

* * *

Bradley looked at the cast iron gate in front of him and then back down at the piece of paper in his hands. He looked at the plaque and saw where it said **ADDAMS** on it. He made a face and tried to find a button to ask to come in when the gate swung open automatically. He blinked at it and walked down the path toward the large gothic house that loomed on the large property. As he walked along, he could see a cemetery on one side of the house and saw another house a long way off that seemed to be overgrown with vines. He lifted an eyebrow at it but ventured on down the gravel toward the front of the house and up to the door, looking at the black Model T in the driveway. He knocked on the door knockers and waited.

The door opened and Lurch looked down. Bradley had been looking around and so when he looked in he gasped in fright at the large man.

"Oh, Jesus… Um… This is the Addam's residence right? Like October… um…"

Lurch just stared at him and then moved to the side, making a moaning noise as he did. Bradley stepped into the decrepit house and was met with the large staircase. Lurch just walked past him and went off to do some other things by himself. Bradley looked around at all the strange things when he heard something rolling across the floor. He looked up the hallway and gawked at Thing as he scooted his way on a skate down the hallway. Thing was moving it with a finger and then sailed in front of Bradley on toward the other hallway.

"What a crazy place…" he said, wondering what he was supposed to do.

He decided that maybe he should just stay where he was when he heard the sound of swordfighting.

"You think you can defeat me?" a male voice said.

"You dare talk to my sister in such a manner?" another voice said.

"I can take care of myself." A female voice said.

"Watch out, Mother!"

"Eingelbert, be a dear and trip your father."

"Don't listen to her. Whose side are you on?"

"Neither side because he's on _mine_! Ha!"

Bradley lifted an eyebrow as the sword fighting got closer.

"Face it, my love, you are much better at archery than at sword craft. I will defeat you both and then you can both dredge the underground tunnel."

"Damn the tunnel! I didn't come over for chores, dear sister!"

"Father, watch the stairs."

Suddenly a man came tumbling down the top half of the stairwell and Bradley made a noise, running up the first half to the man on the floor.

"Dude, are you alright?"

The man with the pencil thin mustache shook his head and popped back up like he hadn't just fallen down a flight of wooden stairs. He whipped his fencing sword around and stuck it into the ground at his feet.

"Splendid. You're new." He said, adjusting his glasses.

"I'm Bradley… I came to see October…"

"Hmm. The two-namer. Duck." He said, pulling Bradley down as a flaming arrow flew down the stairwell and stuck into the wall.

A lithe man with the same mustache as the man in front of Bradley ran to the top of the stairs and snapped his fingers.

"Damn, I missed."

"Well tried, young Pubert, but your aim is shabby. I suggest you take archery lessons."

"Don't be too hard on him, Joel, he took his lessons from Pugsley." The beautiful pale woman from the bistro said, walking up beside this Pubert guy. "But we now have to trapped, dear husband. Unless that repulsive statue is going to be your partner?"

"Statue?" Joel said, looking at Bradley.

"Repulsive?" Bradley said to the woman.

The woman suddenly slipped and seemed to fall down the stairs as well but ended up back flipping onto the landing instead.

"Damn again!" Pubert said.

"Your betrayal is expected, dear brother. I never took you for having a partner."

"I've grown up, Wednesday. I can murder people on my own and everything." He said, pointing to himself. "I've been acquitted."

"Ah, like dear old Dad…"

Bradley just stared at them in horror when October and a younger boy ran up to them.

"Mother, I've- Bradley?" she said, looking very shocked.

He waved a little as Wednesday turned to him, lifting a black eyebrow at him. She directed her epée so that the end was under Bradley's chin.

"What keeps me from running you through?"

"Uh, I have a family."

"So do bugs but that doesn't stop people from killing them when they intrude."

"I was let in by Frankenstein."

"Don't be ridiculous." Pubert said, pulling out a cigar as he walked down the stairs. "Frankenstein's monster couldn't possibly be a butler."

"He's right." Joel said, lighting both his and Pubert's cigars. "Terrorizing people is too demanding a job. He couldn't possibly stop and serve as a butler. That would be taking away from the people of Germany."

"They don't have enough serial monster killers there as I would have liked." Wednesday said with a small shrug.

"Uh…"

"Come on, Bradley…" October said, walking down the stairs and grabbing Bradley's hand. "Tell me who wins!"

The three adults looked at each other and then all got on their guard at once.

* * *

"What the hell is going on in there?"

"They were divvying chores."

"By almost killing each other? Your dad fell down a flight of stairs! Doesn't he need some medical attention?"

"No, he's been scared to death twice so he's pretty fit. Mother has also been trying to electrocute him for the past couple of years now but it seems like she can never get the chance."

Bradley just stared at her with his mouth open and she blinked at him.

"What?"

"My mom was right… You guys are crazy."

"Unstable, probably, but not crazy. Besides, you literally stepped into it. Why are you here?"

"I was trying to figure out how 'dark' I was but I think I figured it out myself."

October suddenly pushed him as another flaming arrow flew past them and all three adults fell down the stairs.

"That oil was strong…" October muttered.

"So it was _your_ doing?"

"Remember, I oiled the stairs."

"Well done, October!" Joel yelled from the pileup, holding up his epee.

"I'm just going to go. This got weirder than I wanted."

"Come now," Wednesday said, standing up from the pile up and stabbing her epee down, hitting someone. "Do stay for dinner. We're having chicken and fingers tonight."

"Don't you mean _chicken fingers_?"

"Did I?" Wednesday asked, lifting an eyebrow.

Bradley regretted coming over.

* * *

**ah here we have family bonding. and a visit from uncle pubert. so... what really is for dinner?**


	9. Outfits and Punishments

**sorry for the delay but netflix took off taf2, where i get a lot of my inspiration from and it finally got back on. i hope this all makes sense...**

* * *

"So… your mom isn't cooking?"

"Mother never cooks. Besides, Cousin Itt is coming over and he likes to cook for us." October said, touching a cotton ball to Bradley's arm. "I told you to move out of the way of my mother."

"I really thought she was going to stop."

"My mother never stops. Please take her seriously. Uncle Pubert is a little different, since he has my grandfather's sense of humor, so I'm told, but my mother is not so… casual."

"She seems rigid as hell."

"She's just practical."

"I can see why she scared my mother."

"Your mother seems easily frightened. There."

Bradley looked at his arm and smiled.

"Thanks… So… was that an invite to dinner or was your mom just trying to scare me?"

"I'll have to double check."

"October?" The door opened and Joel walked in. "Oh, are you alright, kid?"

"Fine, thank you. Um, I'm Bradley Buckman-Smythe." He said, holding out his hand.

Joel took it. "Joel Glicker. So you're the two-namer… I'm sure Cousin Itt will be delighted to meet your acquaintance."

"Cousin… Itt?"

"Herman and Allie are coming as well. Dress nice…" Joel looked Bradley up and down. "Dress him up."

He left as Bradley looked at October.

"Who's Cousin Itt?"

"A cousin, of course. Come on, I have to get you some proper attire. We don't wear these types of clothes to the dinner table… especially if Cousin Itt is coming to treat us."

October got up and motioned for him to follow her.

"I'm really confused about all of this. I mean, I just came over to get some clarity on that darkness thing you said. I still have to call my mom and let her know I'm here if I'm going to be staying for dinner and if you need me to change clothes, I can just go get some of my own."

"Nonsense, we have some you can use. Finding the right size will be iffy…" She opened a cabinet and coughed at the dust flying everywhere. "Let's see… I think we have some of my grandfather's old clothes in here… He was always very particular."

Bradley looked around the house and marveled at the intricacies and oldness of it. It was like walking into a museum but at the same time, it was as if the house were constantly themed.

"Let's see… Uncle Fester's summer wardrobe…" October threw a large duffle bag of clothing behind her. "Uncle Fester's winter wardrobe…" She threw another duffle bag behind her. She suddenly gasped, making Bradley turn to her. "Uncle Fester! How long have you been in there?"

"Since that party last year…" he said, stepping out of the closet and wiping himself off. "Cousin Itt and I were in an extreme game of hide and seek and he left me here. There's no lock on the inside."

"Uh, well, Mother will be delighted that you are alright. Dementia will be as well. She sorely has missed you."

"Thanks, Wednesday."

"I'm October."

"I'm Fester. See ya."

Bradley watched the bald man walk out of the closet and out of the room. He turned to October, who didn't seem fazed about it at all.

"You _do_ realize a man was just in your guys' closet?"

"At least it was a man this time."

Bradley didn't even want to know what that meant when October finally found what she was looking for.

"Ha, here it is." She pulled out the garment bag and walked over to the bed, laying it out and opening the zipper. "My grandfather's clothing."

Bradley was surprised at the pristine condition of the clothing.

"Wow… whoa, is that real silk?"

"Like I said, Grandfather was particular. He was a man of spontaneity and often had slight themes to his attire. This is what I call, The Matador. Do you know how to put on a three piece suit? And an ascot?"

"I think I can figure the three piece suit out… You guys get this fancy for dinner?"

"Dinner is a special time. Besides, Cousin Itt likes to feel like he's at a restaurant and we oblige him." October began to leave. "Scream if you need anything."

Bradley looked at the outfit and made a face but began to put the clothing on.

* * *

October knocked on her parent's door and Joel opened it.

"Yes?"

"Can I talk to you for a moment?"

Joel closed the door and began to walk with his daughter.

"Dad, how did you know you liked Mom?"

"Your mother? Well, I saw her at first when we were at Camp Chippewa. She stood out from all the other fancy, blonde girls that were there, so droll and in black pigtails. She was an angel to me… Why do you ask?"

"Mother says that I need to ask you about matters of the heart since you have one."

Joel smirked. "Ah, well I can see her saying that."

"Dad, I… I think I might actually have _feelings_ for Bradley. I mean, the spell wore off but his hair is still black."

"That doesn't really mean anything, October. Your mother just thinks all people with blonde hair have issues after what happened to Pubert that one time when Uncle Fester married Debbie. By the way, thanks for finding him, Dementia was so happy when we told her he was found."

"But that's the thing, Dad. I cursed him to have black hair and quack like a duck but the quacking went away. His hair is now naturally black… doesn't that account for anything?"

"Hmm. That's something you'll have to ask Ma-Ma about since she's the one who gave it to you. I personally think he's a nice fellow and he seems to be alright with us. I think if he passes the Cousin Itt test then he will fit right in. What did you get him to wear anyway?"

"One of Grandfather's old outfits."

"I hope your mother doesn't get offended… I guess it wouldn't be too bad since she'll just take it out on me. Hmm… we haven't made angry love in a long time."

"Dad."

"Sorry. Either way, I think he'll be fine and if you like him, there's no reason you can't be with him. He just can't reject the family. Even if your mother isn't too keen on him, I'm not as demented as she is and neither is Ma-Ma. We both have some practicality and I think Ma-Ma would know if he were a threat."

"Yeah… Thanks, Dad."

"Sure thing."

October started walking back towards the room she had lent Bradley.

* * *

"No! No, don't you _dare_ do that!" Bradley hissed into the phone.

"I'm coming over there to get you. How could you do that to me? I told you not to mess with them and now you're going to have _dinner_ with them? What if they poison you? What if they try to torture you and kill you?"

"They're weird, Mom, not murderers."

"How do you know?"

"They just dress in black and have a pretty cool house and are a bit odd but that doesn't mean anything."

"I'm coming over there with your father."

"Mom, don't, please."

The phone suddenly got taken from Bradley's hand and he turned back to see Wednesday holding it up to her ear. He had to say, if October's mother looked this hot, then he wondered what October what look like.

"Greetings, Amanda Buckman." Bradley heard the scream from where he was. "I'm delighted to hear from you as well. If you insist on coming, we'll make sure to leave a spot for you and Mr. Buckman at the table. Dress your finest; we don't allow casualty when Cousin Itt comes to visit. Oh, and you _did_ have your vaccines recently, right? Hello? Hmm, must have hung up."

Wednesday handed the phone back to Bradley and he took it, in awe of her. Wednesday took in the two-namer and noticing his black hair, reached out and touched it with her black painted finger tips.

"I see you have changed your hair."

"Actually, October did that. When she made me quack like a duck it left this behind."

"Or did it?" Wednesday said, looking past him at the outfit on the bed. "That outfit, it was my father's."

"October took it out for me… I won't wear it if you don't want me to."

Wednesday caught his blue eyes in hers and looked at him, making him very uncomfortable. Eventually she reached out and touched her finger under his chin. She moved his head around and lifted an eyebrow. She then turned and began to leave.

"Please be careful with the suit, it's made of very fine silk and tailored to perfection. I would hate to know you've ruined it." She stopped at the door. "After all, he's buried right outside and that was his _favorite_ suit. I wouldn't want him to be angry with you."

Bradley's eyes widened and she left the room, smiling for a second and then went to find Joel.

* * *

When she finally found him, she grabbed his throat and pushed him onto the bed.

"Wenz?" he asked.

"How could you let our daughter keep him here and then allow her to use my father's suit? How disloyal, how horrible, how insatiable."

Joel's eyes widened and he smiled, taking off his glasses and looking up at her.

"_Cara mia_…"

"_Mon cher_…"

"Do you want to hurt me, my love?"

"I want to do lots and lots of things to you, Joel Glicker."

She ripped off his jacket and his shirt, putting her hands on his bare flesh. Joel unzipped the back of Wednesday's dress and pulled it forward so that she could slip out of it. She easily did and then stood up so that it dropped to the floor and she also went to the door, locking it. She stood in front of him in black bra and panties and had locked him in. He wasn't sure what she was going to do to him as he sat up.

"I was surprised you almost defeated me today in our little sword game. It was so unlike you. You were poised, ready to defend, so gallant; I wanted you then. Do you want me, Joel?"

"Yes, yes I do."

"Then crawl on your hands and knees to me, Glicker. I want to see you beg. Plead with me and accept your punishment for letting October take out my father's clothing to let that odd boy into our home."

"Odd? We're ones to talk…" he mumbled as he did as Wednesday had asked him. "Why are you calling him odd?"

"He has a darkness in him and yet still retains that goody-two shoes mentality. The balance is odd." Joel made his way to her legs, kissing them as he trailed up her body. "I can't figure out if I want to study him or do an autopsy on him."

"Study _me_, Wednesday…" Joel mumbled under his kisses on her stomach and going up. "Your eyes and thoughts should only be on *me*, _cara mia_."

When he got to her neck, Wednesday put her hand in front of his face and pushed him down to the ground again. He started up the other side of her as she thought for a second.

"Joel?"

"Yes?"

"I inadvertently invited Sarah Miller to our party tonight."

"Are you scared?"

"Of course not, I'm delighted, but I just don't know what to do with her yet."

"How about asking Itt to make us a turkey dinner? You know, to celebrate our "brotherhood"." Joel said, mocking the play of their youth.

"Too simple."

"I think being your normal self will be just fine. Nothing fancy. That's all it took before and you trying too hard hurts my feelings."

"Does it?"

"Indeed." He stopped at her breasts and looked up at her. "It makes me feel like you've lost confidence in yourself and who is supposed to torture me if not you?"

"True. It's hard to enjoy watching you squirm when I try too hard…" Joel finally made it back up to her neck and she grabbed his face in her fingers. "How much do you love me, Joel?"

"More than anything."

"Would you do anything for me?"

"Anything."

"Would you die for me?"

"Of course."

"_Promise_?"

"I've survived two death attempts already, Wenz."

"Would you survive two more?"

"I would rake my body over hot fiery coals and broken glass and then jump into the salt filled ocean for you."

"That can be arranged." She said with a fire in her eyes.

"_Cara mia,_ please let me kiss you and caress you. I can't stand it anymore."

"Are you in pain my love?"

"Excruciatingly so."

"Good." She said, pushing him down to the floor one more time. "I don't know what I want to do for your punishment…"

"This is punishment enough."

"Nonsense: you haven't screamed for me yet."

Until Wednesday thought up a better way to torture her husband, poor Joel was left with the insatiably sensual duty of kissing her from her legs to her head, hoping for the reward of her lips.

* * *

**lemme just... try to explain their love. unlike gomez/morticia's love, which was a deep and soul binding type, joel/wenz love each other but in a very domineering way. wenz has always been that way to me, very domineering and she enjoys seeing people be beneath her. in the movie, one of the last lines joel asks her is about if a man loved her with adoring admiration and such what would she do. her response was pity him. to me, joel is the best of both worlds: he keeps her grounded but is not afraid to let her take the lead in sexual games. he enjoys her being happy and being in control makes her happy and she enjoys pitying him.**

**with that said, this dinner will be interesting in the least. we got all of itts family coming AND the buckmans? oh dear...**

**ps: the uncle/wardrobe thing has been sitting on the shelf waiting to be used, sorry**


	10. Beginnings

**this is not as ooky as usual. it was meant to be. i was mostly playing off amanda's fear on this.**

* * *

"Oh my god, it's worse than I imagined." Amanda said when she got to the gate of the Addams home. "We need to get Bradley and get out of there as quickly as possible."

"Amanda, quit being such a scaredy cat. It's just an old looking house."

"Old? That house looks like a haunted house straight out of a magazine or a horror film. There is a _graveyard_ right over there, do you see it?!"

Matthew looked over and saw the graveyard but shook his head.

"It's a prop from Halloween."

"That is _not_ a prop."

Matthew looked around in confusion. "How do I get in?"

At that moment, Gate opened up and the two looked at each other. Matthew didn't say anything else as he drove up the driveway to the mansion. They stepped out and Amanda felt a chill go up her spine as she wrapped her fur coat around her tighter.

"I want to hurry up and get out of here, Matt."

"Don't be so weird. Come on, let's make friends and peace and just be happy our son found a nice girl to be friends with."

"Friends? Friends?! Matthew, do you hear what you're saying? He can't be _friends_ with these people!"

Mattew rolled his eyes and they walked up to the door. He knocked on the knocker and they waited. It took a moment but Lurch finally opened the door and Matthew made a face.

"Wow, you're a really big dude."

Lurch said nothing but motioned for them to come in. They could hear the sound of a loud pitched noise coming from the back of the house as Lurch showed up beside them, holding out his arms to take their coats. Amanda immediately obeyed and handed him her coat as Matthew looked around in awe.

Joel walked out of the back and smiled, holding a cigar.

"Greetings! Welcome to our home. I hope the trip up here wasn't hard?"

"Not at all. Your home is quite interesting to say the least." Matthew replied.

"It looks like it's haunted." Amanda blurted.

"Unfortunately, it wasn't haunted when Gomez died. We were hoping for a spirit but alas, he had finished all of his works here. Wednesday was quite disappointed."

"You may not remember me but we were at camp together in Chippewa. We were cabin mates."

"Were we?" Joel said, having never forgotten but slyly forgetting. "I try to push that place out of my mind. Too many memories."

"Painful, I know."

"No, happy ones. I get so excited that my adrenaline kicks in and I get antsy. We already had a fight today so I wasn't hoping to have another until later… Then again, your presence here may just make me feel a little different…"

"I'm sorry you and Wednesday had a fight."

"Don't be. No one was hurt much. Just a little stab in the shoulder. Come, meet the family. We're delighted to have you."

Matthew looked at Amanda, who was staring at him with her arms crossed in an 'I told you so' stare.

"Alright, so things are weird."

"Hmm."

They followed Joel to the kitchen where the table was and everyone turned to them as they entered.

"Our late arrivals have entered. Sorry to leave during your display, Itt."

"You didn't miss anything." Harold said, smiling. "He knew you wanted to be here for it so he waited."

"Hey, Mom, Dad!" Bradley said, waving from the other side of the table.

Amanda yelled, almost fainting into her husband.

"What is that you're wearing?!"

"Uh… clothes?"

"I hate to be a bother but Itt has a meal to cook for us, you are late, and we are hungry. If you don't sit down, we will _really_ have you for dinner." Wednesday growled, looking at Amanda from her position at the table.

Amanda and Matthew took their seats next to What and Harold as Itt continued his presentation.

Once done, everyone began to partake of Itt's meal and Margaret rolled her eyes in satisfaction.

"Oh, Itt, honey, this is delicious! One of your best so far!"

"Hey, this _is_ really good." Bradley said, scooping the rice into his fork. "I'm pretty surprised."

"Cousin Itt always has the best food. Thanks!" October praised.

"Amanda, don't be rude." Matthew hissed.

Amanda was pretty much in shock the whole time. Wednesday liked it like that.

"Is it too spicy for you, Mr. Buckman?" What asked, looking at Matthew.

"Huh? Oh, no, it's perfect. Thank you. I have to say I'm quite impressed. This is almost as better as going out to an Asian restaurant and ordering this. You're a true cook, Itt."

Cousin Itt was being bashful and hid his… face in Margaret's shoulder. She pat him with a smile.

"He says you're flattering him. He was happy to prepare the meal for everyone."

"Your wife eats little." Wednesday commented.

"She's not feeling well."

"Indeed. Should we make some turkey instead?"

"Nope!" Amanda suddenly yelled, standing up. Everyone looked at her and she sat back down. "I mean… sorry, I don't eat turkey meat."

"Dear me, I wonder why?" Wednesday said with a look toward her.

Amanda made a face and slightly picked up some rice with her fork. _Just remember there's a person under the hair. Just remember there's a person under the hair._ she said to herself as she ate the rice.

"So, Glicker, how in the *world* did you end up with this lovely woman? She seems like an odd fish to catch."

"He was like a fly that flew into my web. Once he was there I wrapped him up in my silk and consumed him." Wednesday said.

"I never stood a chance… Actually, we didn't start getting serious until after her father's funeral. It was there that I knew I loved her. She was dressed in her funeral attire, all ready to go, her skin pale against the black… She was a regal beauty…"

"That's so… morbid…" Matthew said. "So you realized her loved her at her father's funeral? Was she crying?"

"No, she never cries."

"He does though." Wednesday said.

"Although I was infatuated with her early on, after the second time she scared me to death, I knew she liked me back. It was off and on after that."

"His heartbeat that is."

"His… heartbeat?"

"When I say she scared me to death, I meant that in a literal sense."

Matthew blinked at Wednesday, who was drinking from her wine cup.

"Why would you want to do that? I mean, was it some sort of ploy?"

"What better way to test a man's endurance than by seeing how many times his heart can stop before he gives up? I set my limit to three and he endured them all… I should have aimed higher."

"So she literally stopped your heart?"

"Yup. What about you? What normal way did you find Amanda?"

"Uh, well…"

"They had sex." Wednesday said bluntly.

Amanda had been enjoying the wine and spit it out. She looked at Wednesday as she stared at her.

"You had sex and then got married."

"Um well…"

"Don't judge us for the way we do things, you freak!" Amanda growled. "You with your crazy thinking and creepy house and abnormal relationship."

"I was making a statement of the obvious. _You're_ taking it as judgmental, as if I actually care about your reputation."

Amanda sat down and she stuffed her face with rice.

"Wow, this got super awkward." Bradley said.

"I'll say." October said.

"October, why don't you go show Bradley the swamp? I'm sure he'd like that." Joel said with a wink and a look to her mother, who was trying to rile Amanda up even more.

"Right. Would you like the see the swamp?"

"The swamp?"

"Yup. It's fun. Come on."

"But I wasn't finished-"

October pushed Bradley out of the room and then she came back and grabbed Eingelburt and What to accompany them.

"Where is she taking him?" Amanda asked.

"Don't worry. She'll take good care of him." Wednesday said with a slight smile.

* * *

"Why did we go? I was really enjoying that rice." Bradley said.

"Just don't worry about it. Besides, this will be a good time to ask Grandmama about the question you asked me. In regards to the spell."

"Oh. So… we're going to go see her?"

"Yeah. She's in a different part of the house."

Bradley looked behind him and didn't see Eingelburt and What.

"Hey, uh… where did those other two go?"

"Probably to the graveyard. You ask too many questions."

"There's too much stuff to be curious about. Was your father telling the truth about him really being scared to death?"

"Yes." October opened the door to the lower part of the house and started heading down the staircase. "Now don't talk, let me. You'll say something stupid and she'll put another curse on your or something."

Bradley nodded as they went down the staircase and into what looked to him like a witch's lair. *Double, double, toil and trouble…* he said as they got to the end of the staircase.

"Grandmama! Grandmama, it's me, October!"

"Ah, so it is. Come in, child, come in."

"I brought Bradley with me, is that going to be alright?"

"The two-namer you mentioned before?"

"Yes, but we have a question in regards to the spell you gave me. It seems to have had an odd side effect."

"Hmm… Bring him in."

October grabbed Bradley's hand and pulled him to her as they both stood in front of a chair. The older woman got up and turned and Bradley was surprised that she was not as ugly as he thought she was.

"Bradley, this is my grandmother, Morticia. Grandmama, this is Bradley Buckman-Smithe."

"Uh… how do you do?" he asked and then gasped when Thing scrambled up his body and sat on his shoulder.

"Thing, there you are. I've been looking everywhere for you." Morticia said. She looked at Bradley. "So, you are the two-namer… Odd, your hair is not blonde as was told me before."

"That's the thing, Ma'am. When I stopped quacking like a duck, my hair never turned back to normal. It's actually grown since then and it's not growing back in blonde."

"We were wondering what this could mean."

Morticia walked over to Bradley and touched his face, looking at it this way and that. Then she noticed the outfit he had on. She put her hands to her mouth.

"Oh… that outfit… It was Gomez's favorite…" She touched Bradley's face again but this time it was a soft touch. "You're fortunate to look good in it."

For some reason that made him blush and he looked away as Morticia walked over to her book and looked in it. She turned a couple of pages and then looked at Bradley a couple of times.

"When did the spell wear off?"

"Uh, well, it was after I went to McDonald's with October. I got back in the car and I could talk."

Morticia looked at him. "So it was not the next day?"

"No, ma'am."

There was a loud noise that shook the ceiling of the lair and everyone looked up.

"What was that?"

"Either Dad opened a book on the civil war or Eingelburt and What got into Mother's explosives." October said nonchalantly.

"Did you do anything significant before the curse was taken off of you?" Morticia asked.

"Uh… not that I'm aware of. Why?"

"It says that an act of kindness towards the one who cast the spell will result in the spell breaking. But… the fact that you kept this black hair means that there is more to you than we thought… You have a darkness in you, young Bradley, and it seems to go quite deep. It looks as if it has to do with how you broke this spell."

"So, what do I do? I mean, I'm not freaked out but it's a little weird."

"You will have to find out what you did and figure out the motive. Once you figure out the motive, you can find what darkness it is you have."

"I see… That actually makes a lot of sense. Thanks uh…"

"You can call me Grandmama."

"Right."

Bradley and October left and Thing got on Morticia's shoulder. She touched him tenderly.

"You see it too, don't you, Thing?" Thing squatted up and down in agreement. "He'll figure it out soon."

* * *

**so what is it that connects bradley to the darkness huh? i'm sure some of you will figure it out. and someone had asked for more morticia. wish granted. i didn't want her to be just like grandmama addams, who was really whacky. morticia has and always will be regal and reasonable. this is her now able to 'seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade' that's all. anyway, she'd be more down to earth about it as she has always been.**


	11. Mama Guillotine

October and Bradley walked through the graveyard towards the back of the house.

"So do you really have a swamp back here?"

"Yup."

Bradley followed October at a nice pace, hearing someone scream every now and then from the house. He figured it was his mother.

"So… do you think we'll be able to figure out what's up with me?"

"Do you not like your black hair? Can't you just dye it?"

"It would look weird now. I'm getting kind of used to it, actually. I think it suits me better than my other."

October blinked at him and he smiled. She felt a small blush but turned so that he didn't see it.

"We don't have the see the swamp if you don't want to. Then again, it has a tendency to suck people into it and I'm sure Mother would be furious if you got Grandfather's clothes dirty… Grandfather would probably be furious too."

Bradley looked around when she said that and he turned around.

"Yeah, I think sticking with a graveyard will do nicely… or will someone come up from there?"

"We only play 'Wake The Dead' on Halloween. Although every now and again Calpurnia turns up to dance naked in the graveyard but we just leave her alone."

"Uh… I'm just going to nod and keep going."

"You don't have to stay here, you know. I know you want to learn about why your hair is black but you didn't have to stay for dinner or anything. Mother is just very persuasive."

"She's kind of a push over."

"That's true but she's actually not as crazy or demented as people think she is. She's just practical."

Bradley laughed a little. "I guess… So your dad and uncle…"

"They have a strange relationship. I'm not sure who is trying to be more like my grandfather, although Uncle Pubert is better at it. Father just likes to play around I think."

"Does your family always fight like that?"

"On Wednesdays and if Uncle Pubert comes over. Usually the fight is between Mom and Dad and usually Dad loses. Not sure if it's because he wants to or because he just can't win against my mother. She's pretty tough."

"So how did your mom and dad meet?"

"Camp Chippewa, the same place your parents did."

"Your mother doesn't seem like the Chippewa type. Or as my mom says, "Have the Chippewa spirit."" He said, quoting Amanda.

October smiled. "No, they were tricked into being sent by Uncle Fester's temporary wife, Debbie. She's buried out here somewhere…" she said, looking around.

"Uh, I'm good. I don't need to see her… or her grave."

"Pity… anyway, she tricked them into going but as you can see by the absence of the place, they didn't take to it quite well."

"Yeah, my mom still won't eat turkey because of it. She also has an affinity to apples… and doesn't like fires too much. She's slowly getting over the fire part and Dad can finally light the fireplace in the winter without her screaming."

"Well, if she had to go to a crazy house, I think Mother would be a lot kinder to her."

"They also swear they saw a baby while they were in an airplane but I think that was just shock."

"Oh no, that was Uncle Pubert."

Bradley looked at her. "A baby can't travel 28000 feet in the air."

"If they get shot into the air via cannonball catapult they can."

"Amanda! Amanda, come back! Amanda!"

Bradley and October looked at each other and headed back up to the house where Amanda was trying to get out while Matthew was trying to pull her back in.

"Amanda, it was just a bit of fun!"

"She's trying to kill me again!"

"Nonsense." Wednesday said, leaning on the doorjamb. "Whatever gave you that idea?"

"The fact that you tried to put arsenic in my tea!"

"It's a condiment, we offer it to everyone. Then again, sometimes it's not for everyone. Should I have offered strychnine instead?"

Amanda finally stood up and pointed at Wednesday.

"You're _crazy_, your whole family! And that daughter of yours is turning out just like you and I won't have my son be a part of this… this freak show! Matthew, Bradley, we are leaving _now_!"

She turned as Matthew turned back to them and held out his hand to Joel.

"It was nice seeing you again, Glicker. You seemed to have found yourself a good wife, odd as she is. And it was nice to meet the infamous Wednesday Addams. Maybe when Amanda feels better we'll invite you over."

"OVER MY DEAD BODY!"

"That _can_ be arranged! How would you like to be prepared? Cremated or rotting corpse? It's all the same to us." Wednesday said back.

"Either way… Brad, come on, before your mother has a heart attack."

"How lovely." October said with a smile.

Bradley made a face at her and walked to them, looking at Joel and Wednesday.

"Do you want me to bring this back?"

"You need to change here." Wednesday said.

"We can wait for that. I'll let Amanda know."

Bradley went in but Wednesday followed him and he looked behind him.

"Uh… Mrs. Addams?"

"Come with me for a moment. I'll be spiriting you away."

Bradley really didn't have a choice as Wednesday led him through the house.

* * *

"Mrs. Addams, I can undress myself, just so you know."

"I'm aware of your abilities, Two Namer."

"It's Bradley."

"Horrid name. I'll let your father know to change it as soon as he can."

Bradley made a face but noticed they were going past the room he had changed in.

"Where are we going?"

Wednesday said nothing as she walked on and Bradley followed. They eventually got to a room that held a very large guillotine. Wednesday walked over to it and trailed her hand over the shiny wood and new rope.

"Do you know what this is?"

"Uh, yeah, a guillotine. You use it to chop off people's heads."

"Precisely. It's brand new; something Joel thought would cheer me up. Although having it is quite alluring and I can't wait to use it, I won't get any satisfaction until blood stains the blade."

Bradley nodded slowly. "I… understand…"

Wednesday touched the rope and looked at Bradley with a hard stare that scared him but not as much as the smirk she was giving him.

"You're an interesting fellow, "Bradley" but the darkness that has kept your hair the way it is from that petty spell is the only thing I can truly see. When the spell finally wears off, what will you do then?"

"Uh… I don't know…"

"October seems to have a liking for you and I adore picking on your mother, but there are some things that I will not tolerate from anyone. One of them is leading my daughter along."

"Is this a cleaning-my-gun warning?"

"Gun? Oh no, a gun is much too slow and has less effect." Wednesday pulled the rope as the blade lifted into the air and motioned to the hole. "Would you like to see what would happen if you hurt my daughter in anyway?"

"I think I get the point."

"There is no point, only the consequence." She let go of the blade as it slammed down with a **CHOP** noise. She walked closer to Bradley and pointed at him. "October unfortunately has feelings like her father and her fascination with you seems like it may grow into fondness. I hope it will leave her soon but I doubt it. I would *hate* to let her know that I had to get rid of her issue."

Bradley smiled and looked Wednesday in the eyes, which was something most people didn't do.

"Mrs. Addams, believe me, I get what you're saying. You don't trust me like my mom doesn't trust you. You think I'm too goody two shoes to keep up with your family or care about your daughter right?" He pointed his own finger at her, actually surprising her. "Well you're wrong. Even though I'm here to understand what is causing all this, I'm quite interested in your family. I'm interested in _October_. I would do anything for her."

"Is that so?"

Bradley lifted an eyebrow. "I would endure a thousand paper cuts and jump into a pool of alcohol for her."

Wednesday was impressed. "Well then. When the time comes, I hope you will live up to that promise." She walked off. "We take those vows quite seriously around here. Change your clothes, Bradley, my wish of your mother having a heart attack is nigh and as much as I want to see that, I don't think you do."

Bradley let out the breath he'd been holding.

* * *

**ah wenz doesn't take too kindly to those 'playing' with her daughter. but bradley seemed to give an impressive comeback that even made wenz proud. proud enough for her to actually use his own name. we'll learn about this darkness later too.**


	12. Tell Me Lies Thy Pale Fiend

**sorry it's short but it's setting up for the next part of the story.**

* * *

"He would endure a thousand paper cuts and jump into a pool of alcohol, huh?" Joel said as he pressed the peddle on the whetstone and eased one of the Arabian scabbards across it. "That's a bit much."

"Yes, it is." Joel dodged the fourth knife that Wednesday had thrown past him as Lurch held the dart board behind him. "The extent of the 'amount' of love he has for her is troubling. He's smart and seems to catch onto things quickly, but he's normal, which means that he may be trying to exploit something from her."

"Like what?" he asked, lifting up the sword to examine the sharpness.

As if on cue, Wednesday threw another knife and Joel swiped at it, sending the blade in two on the floor. He smiled and stuck it in its place on the wall to grab another.

"Perfect."

"You're avoiding the issue."

"I'm not avoiding anything, Wenz, it's just that you're not the lovey type or the dating type or the living type." Wednesday lifted an eyebrow at that. "But October has a bit of me in her and she wants to like this kid. Let her have herself a cute time trying to like him. Besides, it'll be kind of fun to see how far she gets and how far he's willing to go. Like you said, we'll know for sure when the spell wears off and his hair turns back to normal. What's with that anyway?"

"Mother said it had to do with passing on the curse somehow. When he passed it on, it had to do with October somehow. That's the thing though, I don't want him to break her heart. There are plenty of open graves to fill in our cemetery and having Thing carve Bradley The Two Namer on one of them will not hurt me in the least… Although, I should probably get that ready to go…"

Wednesday headed out of the door but Joel grabbed her around the waist to stop her.

"Now, Wenz-"

"I have a bad feeling about this, Joel, and although bad feelings mean despair and heartache, I don't like it when it involves my family's despair and heartache."

"You love it when I'm not happy."

"That's you, Joel, not my daughter. It makes me smile when you're sad… It turns me on."

Joel smiled and nuzzled his nose in the nape of her neck.

"You're overreacting. Come, I'll let you put me on the rack."

Wednesday turned to him, smirking a little.

"Why Joel, you never let me put you on the rack."

"Will it make you feel better?" he asked, tugging at her earring.

"Will you choke on that earring?"

"Doubtful." He said, kissing down her neck to her shoulder and down her arm.

"Damn shame."

"How can I scream if I'm choking?" he whispered.

Wednesday turned around and he lifted an eyebrow at her.

"Oh, Joel…" she said, grabbing his shirt and pulling him to her lips. "I have to have you _now_!"

He growled seductively as he pushed her backwards down the hallway.

"Oh, _cara mia_…"

"_Mon cher_!"

He picked her up and ran to their room.

* * *

A moaning noise and a shake from above told October that she needed to sleep elsewhere tonight.

* * *

Bradley woke up in a cold sweat and ran his fingers through his hair. He then found a wad of hair in his hand and gasped, running to the bathroom. He turned the light on and saw that his hair had indeed come out. He gulped and ran his hand through his hair again. Another wad of hair came out and he sighed, just grabbing all the hair and throwing it into the trashcan. He looked at his bald self in the mirror and sighed again.

"Should have known…" he said, rolling his eyes.

He went to bed and decided to deal with it in the morning.

When he woke up, he went to brush his teeth and found that his hair had grown back but was back to normal. He touched it and ran his fingers through it to make sure that it was real and saw that it was. He fist pumped the air and did a small dance.

"Yes! Now I don't have to deal with that family anymore! Oh, thank God!"

* * *

Wednesday sipped some tea on the balcony as she overlooked the forest and the vine covered house where the old judge used to live. She looked at the parchment she held between her fingers and lifted an eyebrow. Then she smirked a little as if she had heard something. _I'm always right._

"Thing." She said, her face returning to her stoic nature.

The hand appeared beside her and she sipped the tea a little more.

"Is this true?"

He bobbed up and down to answer 'yes' and Wednesday folded up the paper.

"Well then, I believe it's time we up the ante a bit."

She walked back into the house and walked down the stairs and then to the basement. She grabbed the key on the ring and opened up a door where a large book lay on a table. As she walked by the wall, she put her fingernails on it and pulled, the sound of tearing filling the empty room.

"Besides, I never. Trust. Blondes." She hissed as she turned away from the only remaining picture of Debbie Jalinski.

* * *

**hmm, it looks like some truths are revealed here and anyone should know not to piss off wednesday. you make a promise like that to her, you'd better keep it. and surprise! it looks like bradley was playing the innocent huh? btw, wenz had sent thing to spy.**

**as forewarning: no one really knows what the addams family actually IS in regards to their way of life. are they immortals? are they witches? who knows. but they have traits about them that aren't of course, human and abilities that go beyond normal. so, going forward, there will be a bit of exploration of that. no, i won't be making them aliens or some shit, but i'm going to explore the more... ooky part of their nature. nothing farfetched, of course.**


	13. The Truth Will Get You Nowhere

October looked at Bradley as he looked at her nervously.

"Your hair changed back…"

"Yeah, overnight. I went bald first though…"

"I see." She sighed. "And the darkness seemed like it would be so wonderful for you."

Bradley smiled nervously. "I'm sorry, October, but your family is a little beyond me."

"That's what most people say… Will you come around?"

"I might… Probably not. Your mom wants to kill me."

"She wants to kill everyone. She says it's a shame she can't but lives with it." she said with a nonchalant shrug.

Bradley didn't realize how slightly off this family was until now. It was as if a small veil had lifted and he was seeing things clearly now. He liked October for what she was worth but he would never be able to handle that family. He wished he could and he wondered for the life of him how he had gotten the strength to point his finger at her mother and then make the promise that he did. He was going to have to tell her the truth.

"October… I don't know what happened or why it happened, but you _do_ realize that we're not friends, right?"

October turned her head to the side.

"What are you saying?"

"I… I only hung out with you because I wanted to understand what was going on. I found out more than I really wanted to know and so… I mean… we can still talk and stuff but I'm not exactly… your type."

"Or is it that _I_ am not _yours_?" she said, her eyes low and glaring into his soul.

"Actually, I'm pretty versatile when it comes to girls or friends but I mean… Your mom threatened to kill me with a guillotine and unlike most people, I know she meant it. It's not that I don't like you, October-"

"You just don't like my family… the very part of my life that makes me who I am."

"Well… yeah, kind of. You're just a little too odd for me."

October had never understood what her father meant when he said that heartache was like dying, but now she did. She didn't realize how far she had fallen for the Two Namer and now she was just where her mother said she would be, heartbroken and alone. Not that October minded being alone but she thought that maybe Bradley was different. She was going to show her mother that not all blonde people were just using them, the Addams, as a gain. She knew that they had a bad history of people doing that to them: Tully Alford, Dr. Pinderschloss, Debbie Jalinski, many others she didn't exactly know by heart. She just never expected Bradley Buckman-Smithe to be one of them.

"October, I'm sorry, truly."

She looked up at him and a rare one of her mother's smiles crossed her lips as she looked at him. He was actually taken aback by how evil she looked.

"Although it pains me to hear that you are not able to keep up with my, as you say, odd family, I regret to inform you that your words can never match the merit that will be needed if my mother finds out what you have done." Bradley actually looked scared. "You told her something quite impressive, and she doesn't get impressed much. I won't do anything to you, Bradley Buckman-Smithe, but rest assured, my _mother_ will."

She turned on her heal and left him standing there looking at a blank space. He finally came out of it and licked his lips.

"Shit, what have I gotten myself into?"

* * *

As soon as Lurch pulled up to the house, October ran out of the car and into the house. She ran up the stairs to her room and flung herself on the bed. She didn't want to cry over him, over some person who had used her, but she truly had hoped that the darkness that was showing through with him would be wonderful. She wanted to explore what he could give her, what he could come up with to please her. His darkness had seemed to be developing enough to even make an impressive promise to her mother with words she could understand. _I just don't understand… I just don't understand…_ she thought, over and over again.

"October?"

She looked up and saw Joel coming in, closing the door behind him.

"Your mother told me to check on you since I seem to have the heart that beats. What happened?"

"It's… irrelevant."

"You ran straight to your room, not to the balcony to practice with your knife throwing. You never miss that."

October sniffled and sat up, crossing her legs.

"Father… I understand what you meant now. I understand heartache."

Joel sighed, took a puff of his cigar. He knew she didn't understand the half of it, just a small fling, but he would leave that alone for now.

"What happened?"

"Bradley was using me to get rid of the darkness within him. Our family is not right for him."

"I see… Well, honey, you have to realize that not everyone understands the Addams family as well as Margaret and I did. We were alright with the strange ways they did things, once we got to know what was needed to survive, and adapted quickly. Now you would never know Margaret used to be married to another man who was as normal as normal could be and (until your grandparents come to town) no one would ever know I used to be scared of everything, allergic to everything and now, I've adapted. Adaption takes a _lot_ of time."

"But he was already adapting, Father. I don't know what he told Mother but hearing that it impressed her is quite a feat for anyone. He was getting there but…"

Joel touched her under her chin. "Fear not my rotten rose, your petals will wither soon and land on a young man just as malleable and moldable as clay. He will appreciate the way you challenge him and mold him to your liking, all the while loving that he can please you in any way possible."

October quickly wiped he one tear that escaped.

"But I thought he was that one…"

"They come and go. You're young; you'll find something."

October got up and gave Joel a rare hug and he pat her back gently.

"Besides, I'm sure your mother has already caught wind of this and is preparing something to enact her revenge… I just hope she doesn't do anything drastic."

"As mother goes, I trust she will find something that fits him perfectly."

* * *

"Mother, do you think you could make this for me?" Wednesday asked Morticia, handing her a torn page.

Morticia took it and looked at it for a moment. She lifted an eyebrow at it.

"You want to enact this on the boy?"

"Yes."

Eingelburt walked by with a saw in his hand and Wednesday turned to him.

"Who is that for?"

"October. I know she's not feeling well." He said with a smile.

She held out her hand. "I don't think so…"

He looked dejected as Wednesday walked over to the corner of the room and grabbed a pair of keys.

"Go around back to the garden and get the chainsaw." He grinned and ran off. She turned back to Morticia. "Kids…"

"I remember one of your first mistakes." Morticia said, getting some potions from the shelf. "A cleaver indeed…"

"Yes and now I always use a hatchet."

"And he will learn soon enough. Ah, here we have it."

Morticia started pouring in the serums she had and waited for the cauldron to start boiling. When it seemed to be where it was supposed to be, she took the paper that Wednesday had given her and held it about the brew.

"_Vei implora trupul uman_

_Pielea ta va mirosi de moarte_

_Foamea nu va disparea_

_Dar totul va avea gust de cenusa_"

She dropped the paper into the cauldron and a green smoke rose from it. Wednesday smirked and leaned on the table.

"Am I able to put a counter in there?"

"You should be able to. What would you like the counter to be?"

Wednesday wrote it on a piece of paper and Morticia read it. She lifted her eyebrow at her daughter.

"Is that all?"

"If it were me, I wouldn't even _do_ a counter measure but… I guess Joel's soft heart has infected me and I feel like I should make an out. Besides, I'm teaching the boy a lesson. He will understand truly what it is like when no one understands him anymore. When his normal just… isn't the same as everyone else's."

Morticia smirked. "I see." She threw the paper in and the smoke turned golden. "It's finished."

"Excellent. Thing?" The hand scurried up to Wednesday's leg and she smiled. "Ask Pugsley to deliver something for me. He'll enjoy it since it involves that blow dart gun he hasn't been able to use."

Thing bobbed up and down and ran to get Pugsley.

* * *

**oh my, things are getting a bit heated. i wonder what wenz has in store for poor idiotic bradley?**


	14. A She-Devil ALWAYS Protects Her Young

**just a little forewarning, later on wenz is a little more intense than usual**

* * *

It had been a week since October had talked with Bradley. She hadn't seen him at school for a while and she asked her mother what she had done to him but Wednesday swore that she wasn't the culprit, adding that she wish she had been. October even walked past his home to see if he was there but didn't really get to see anything. She hated that she was worried but since he had technically broken her heart and had done such a promise to her mother, October just hoped that he didn't get killed or something worse.

Finally, while Lurch was taking October and Engelburt to school, she spotted Bradley walking slowly towards the school and she gasped, pointing out the window.

"Lurch, stop the car."

"What's wrong?" Wednesday asked.

"It's Bradley!"

"Oh no, he's lives." Her mother mumbled with an annoyed look.

October ignored her and turned to Joel.

"Dad, can I walk with him?"

"I don't think that's a wise choice, October." Wednesday said.

"Why not?"

Joel made a face at his wife as she kept her calm and collected.

"Trust me, darling, you'll want to stay away for a little bit. Onward, Lurch."

Lurch nodded and the car went forward again. October sighed and crossed her arms in the seat in front of her parents as Joel looked at his wife.

"What did you do, Wenz?"

"Nothing."

He knew that wasn't true but decided to wait until tonight to get it out of her. He leaned over to her and grabbed her earring in his teeth and tugged on it a little.

"I think we should discuss it tonight… in the dungeon perhaps? That cat-o-nine-tails isn't going to flail me all by itself."

"Do you plan on choking on that earring?"

"Not right now."

"Then cease pulling on it." Joel stopped. Wednesday suddenly threw her arm out and grabbed a hold of his pectoral muscle, digging her nails into it. She pulled him to her and she turned slowly. "I want to switch things up tonight."

"That so!?" he gasped, her nails really hurting him. "What would you like?"

"I want you to be a man tonight."

Joel's pain left for a moment and he looked at his wife in confusion.

"You do?"

"I can't do all the work, Joel, stop being so lazy."

She let go of him and he hissed, massaging his pectoral muscle. He could take a lot of things from his wife but for some reason her nails hurt more than any torture she had done to him. Joel figured it was the bluntness of the nails. She grabbed him by the nipple and pulled him to her.

"And Joel? I want to scream. _Make me scream_."

"I will try my best, _cara mia_."

"Your best is never good enough. I want you to take me to the grave."

Joel nodded and the car stopped in front of October's school. She started to get out when Wednesday called her.

"October." She turned back. "Please don't be anywhere alone with the Two-Namer. That's all I ask."

October nodded and Lurch started the car up to go to Engelburt's school.

* * *

Bradley slowly opened his locker and put his books in. His body had been killing him all week. He woke up hungry and went to bed hungry. Every day his taste seemed to be getting stranger but he was still craving something; he just didn't know what. His mouth was always salivating, as if he wanted something, but whenever he ate, the food was bland and the craving never ceased. He just wanted to feel full, feel satisfied. Being around people didn't help since the craving seemed to intensify ten times more in a crowd.

His stomach rumbled and he put his hand to his aching belly. Even though he ate something this morning, it wasn't what he wanted. He threw it up later anyway. That was another thing that angered him. He would eat a meal and then not an hour or so later, he would vomit it back up again. He just wanted to sate the craving that was gnawing at his stomach and making him so weak.

"Bradley?"

Bradley turned a little and saw that it was October.

"Oh. Hey." He said softly.

She made a face at him. "Are you… alright?"

"No." he said, grabbing his stomach.

He braced for the twisting sensation in his stomach, clenching his fist on the locker as it seemed to twist and hold. Bradley didn't realize he was holding his breath until the pain went away and he seemed to deflate against the lockers. Usually October wouldn't be concerned of his plight (she'd be enjoying it, probably) but it seemed wrong to her. She quickly threw his hand to his forehead and felt the fever there.

"As much as I would like to see you a little less perky, this fever is concerning."

"Don't _touch_ me." He snapped, slapping her hand away from him. "I'm fine. I don't need or want your help."

October sighed and walked off, leaving Bradley to his issues.

When she walked away, he sniffed after her, his mouth watering in torrents from his mouth. She smelled _so_ good. Good enough to _eat_. The thought of that made him sick and he ran as quickly as he could to the bathroom, vomiting the rest of breakfast into the toilet.

* * *

All day.

All. Day.

All _damned_ day!

All day Bradley's mouth salivated more than usual, the kids looking a little different to him than ever before. The smell of normal food repulsed him and when he got near someone who looked so tender, so juicy… He would get shivers down his spine and a puddle of drool would pour from his mouth practically. What was _wrong_ with him? It was as if he wanted to eat them… the people… The flesh… The meat…

Bradley had finally had enough. He knew that something was up and he had a feeling it was Mrs. Addams' fault. How, he didn't know, but somehow this was her. He'd tromp right over to the estate and tell her what for.

"And then get my head chopped off…" he thought aloud as he walked towards said estate. "Think logically, Bradley. You can't just go in there and demand stuff from that crazy lady…"

His stomach rumbled and he stopped, leaning against the building he was next to. The cravings were starting to become unbearable. He was weak, everything looking like a meal but nothing he'd want to satisfy himself with. He spent every penny he had trying to find something that was good enough for him, but all he did was vomit it up. As a couple people passed him, he noticed that they all seemed to put their hands over their noses or their collars over them. He looked around and saw that he was by a flower shop. He sniffed around, suddenly smelling something pretty putrid as the wind picked up. It was so bad that he thought he saw a couple of flowers wilt. He walked away quickly, hoping to not have to smell it anymore.

For some reason though, the smell seemed to intensify. It was almost sickening to breathe. He turned around, wondering what it was, when he saw people looking at him shaking their heads.

"Ugh, that guy should learn how to use soap already. It's the 21st Century, you know?" a girl said, giving a dirty look to Bradley.

Bradley made a face and then lifted his arm, sniffing his skin. He almost vomited again from the smell. It was like death. Like a dead rat in the walls of a house that no one could get to and it was permeating the air ducts.

"What the hell?!" Bradley growled, clenching his fist. "Now I'm _really _pissed off! That stupid gothic bitch!"

He tromped towards the Addams' estate the best he could since his strength was growing thin.

* * *

"I'm impressed." Wednesday said later that night.

"Are you? That's rare…"

"You're doing well, _mon cher_."

Joel smiled a little as he turned the wheel on the rack and Wednesday let out a moan of pleasure.

"Do it again, Joel!"

He turned it harder and she moaned again with a scream. Joel grinned, ready to do another, when Thing came tumbling in, seeming frantic for a hand. He crawled on top of Wednesday and began to try and do sign language.

"It's annoying when you stutter, Thing." Joel said casually.

The poor hand looked around frantically to figure out what to do when he saw paper and a pen and took off to it, writing something down. When he was done he balled it up and ran back to Joel. He picked it up and unraveled it, also unraveling the rack's tight hold.

"Thing says you're expecting someone?"

Wednesday smiled and quickly picked up her dress from the floor.

"Yes, I am."

"You never answered my question, by the way."

"Walk with me and you'll find out."

He followed her as she got dressed into something a little more casual and then to a ten gallon washtub.

"Bring that."

Joel did as told as Wednesday went to the front door and stood on the small porch. It was foggy, the perfect night. It was very romantic.

"The weather is favorable for a zombie attack."

"Wouldn't that be lovely?"

"Indeed." Joel whipped around suddenly at the sound of rasping. "What was that?"

"You'll see."

They waited when a figure began to emerge from the fog. It took a moment before Joel realized who it was and then he looked at his wife in shock.

"What did you do, Wednesday?"

"Nothing."

"You!" they rasped, pointing at her. "_You _did this to me! What's going on?! What's happening to me?!"

"Well, if it isn't the Two-Namer…"

"Don't play around with me you gothic freak!" Bradley screamed, glaring at her with bloodshot eyes. "What the hell did you do to me?!"

"You turned out much better than expected."

"ANSWER ME!"

"Are you hungry?"

"Stop avoiding-"

"I think I have exactly what you want in here." she said, dipping her hand in and flicking a little towards Bradley.

The smell was intoxicating, liberating. It was the sweetest smell he'd ever encountered. He walked a little forward as Wednesday reached into the dark liquid and pulled something out. Joel didn't realize what it was until it was dripping down Wednesday's arm and onto the concrete.

"Wednesday, what did you _do_?" Joel said, horrified for the first time in ages.

Bradley stumbled up the stairs, landing on his knees. He crawled up them to where Wednesday knelt down, holding the item in her hand. Upon seeing it, Bradley stopped but still stared at it.

"Isn't this what you want? Isn't this what you're craving right now?"

"I _won't_ eat that."

"I think you will… if you want it bad enough…" she said, moving it from side to side.

Bradley followed it and felt himself reaching for it, yearning for it, although there were tears falling down his face at the horror of his revelation.

"Please… Please…"

"I told you that one thing I don't tolerate from anyone is someone who will lead my daughter along. Didn't I say that?"

"Yes… you did…"

"And although I didn't kill you like I would have liked (laws and all; so petty), I said that I would show you what I would do to someone who _did_ hurt her in any way. Didn't I say that?"

"Yes, you did…"

"Did I not say that there were only consequences?" she said, her gaze getting lower and more piercing.

The object was becoming more enticing to him and Bradley lunged, trying to get it. Wednesday laughed one of her rare laughs and Joel backed up, knowing that an even darker part of his wife was being revealed.

"Didn't I say that?"

"Yes!" Bradley snarled, trying to get at her again.

"You shouldn't have made a promise that was impossible for your normal mind to comprehend and keep, Bradley Buckman-Smythe."

"GIVE IT TO ME!" he snarled.

Wednesday grabbed him under the chin and looked into his black eyes, ignoring the smell.

"Are you hungry?" she whispered.

"Insatiably so…" he said, breathing heavily.

She stood up, pulling Bradley up with her, and pointed to the washtub.

"Eat up, my little ghoul."

As if a top was unleashed he leapt to the washtub, grabbing anything his hand laid on and tearing into it without hesitation. His hunger blinded his mind from the horror of what he was doing but his emotions were fine.

As he bit into a human leg and tore off the flesh with a mighty yank, the tears he was shedding down his cheeks added flavor to the otherwise most delicious meal he'd ever had in his life.

* * *

**you don't mess with things that are wednesday's personal possessions. that is a no-no. and he's not a zombie. the answer is in her statement. those who watch anime may have even realized it earlier.**

**ps: i don't put it past the addams' to do things like this but of course, we only see certain angles of their lives through movies and shows. this is my take on could and would. plus, gomez and morticia were more of the sociable type than wenz was in the movies. i technically don't put it past HER rather than the whole family. petty things here and there but wenz seems like the type that if you're going to get revenge then you'd better get REVENGE.**


	15. Show Mercy To Those Who Sin

Joel paced the living room floor as Wednesday watched him comically, finding his jittery state such a turn on.

"How could you do this, Wednesday?"

"It wasn't that hard."

"That's not what I meant! You _changed_ someone into a ghoul!"

"I thought it was appropriate."

"No! It's not! I can handle a lot of things that the Addams' do but this is unacceptable."

"How so? The kids try to kill your parents every time they come for a visit."

"_I_ try to kill my parents every time they come for a visit. That's different. They're _my_ parents not someone else's! Even if it were someone else in general, I wouldn't care, but this is someone's _child_!"

"He hurt my child."

"That's what kids _do_! It's part of growing up! Love, heartache, crushes; it's all part of adolescence."

"He should have been an adolescent somewhere else then."

Joel scoffed and walked over to the couch where Bradley was laying, looking at nothing. He had been in shock ever since he finished off the last of the body parts in that ten gallon washtub. Now that he thought about it.

"Wenz, where did you get that body?"

"The morgue. He was a John Doe. I planned this carefully, _mon cher_."

"Don't you _mon cher_ me." He growled, pointing his finger at her. "This is not a laughing matter.

His demanding attitude was making Wedensday want him to take her now, with everyone watching. Joel was hardly like this so when he was…

Joel went back over to Bradley and knelt in front of him. The stench had gone down just a little, but not much.

"Bradley, can you hear me?" he asked, snapping his fingers.

Bradley's eyes flickered to him, red from crying as well as from his new form.

"Can you talk?"

"Yeah." He said softly.

"Listen, there's no way you can go back home. It's impossible."

"I don't want to stay here."

"I know you don't but if you go back home, you could eat your parents. You're untamed so anything could set you off. Besides, the stench coming off of you is… well, quite unbearable."

Bradley sat up, staring at Joel for a second and then looked behind him at Wednesday. He frowned at her and then pointed.

"It's _your_ fault I'm like this."

"Oh no Bradley, I do believe it's yours."

"How is me like this my fault?!"

"I told you that if you hurt my daughter that there would be consequences. Although I didn't get to try out my new guillotine, you're about as close to death as I can make you without breaking any normal laws."

"So, what? Were you being _merciful_?" Bradley spat.

"Actually, I was. You should be honored; I've never been merciful to anyone. You're the first in my whole life."

"Well whoopty-fucking-doo! I am the first to receive Mrs. Addams' mercy in all of history. Well fuck you, you gothic, crazy bitch! Turn me back to what I was! Turn me back into a human!"

"Oh dear, he's angry." Wednesday deadpanned as she looked at Bradley expressionless as always. "I think I could be scared."

"He has ever right to be angry, Wenz. You just turned him into something inhuman." Joel said.

"No, he's still human. Ghouls just have certain attributes that can't be ignored… like the craving of human flesh. I could have made him mindless by making him a zombie… or I could have turned him into a werewolf and let him unknowingly kill innocents in his incognizant state. My _mercy_ is in letting him keep his thinking faculties."

Bradley had to admit that even though the state he was in was pretty sucky, he would rather know when cravings hit him or something than to unknowingly hurt someone. He had kept them at bay for a while before it was too much, so doing it further along shouldn't be too difficult.

"So what do I do now? You said that I can't go home, so what do I do?"

"You'll have to stay here. I can supply you want you want."

"I don't want anymore. I'm done."

Wednesday smiled and Bradley looked away.

"Of course you are. Just as a vampire doesn't need to drink blood."

She got up and left the room, leaving Joel and Bradley alone. Joel turned to Bradley and sighed.

"I'm really sorry about this."

"What does it matter? I'm stuck here with all of you freaks… Why did you marry that crazy lunatic?"

"I didn't marry her, she married me. That's a question you'll have to ask her when you're brave enough to do it. In the mean time, Lurch will show you your room and you'll need to call your mother to make up an excuse."

* * *

"WHAT?!" Amanda yelled over the phone.

"Yeah… but don't worry, I'm safe and you don't have to worry-"

"How can I _not_ worry when you're over at that crazy woman's house?! Are you trapped there? Are you stuck in a coffin and you can't get out?"

"No, Mom, I'm just hanging out here."

There was a bit of a struggle from the other end and Bradley looked at the phone in confusion.

"Hey, Brad, it's me." His father said. "Your mother is just overreacting. You're safe right?"

"Yeah, nothing bad's going on." He said looking at his arm and wrinkling his nose at the smell.

"Well if you're not in any danger then that's fine with us-"

"What are you _crazy_?!" Amanda yelled in the background.

"Rather that's fine with _me_. Just make sure to go to school and get your studies done."

"Sure thing."

Bradley hung up and sighed, looking around the dusty room and wondering why no one ever dusted in the house. Then again, he had seen the large man who looked like Frankenstein's monster dusting a few times…

"Eingelburt! What! Get back here! Those are my bear traps!" he suddenly heard in the hallway.

A young boy ran by and then a strange pillar of hair scooted behind him. He then saw October run after them and turned his head at the scene. After running past his room someone stopped.

"Ugh! What's the smell?!"

It was October. He could hear her spit and she coughed a little.

"Man, something must have died in there. I hate it when Grandmama forgets to put the embalming fluid in her animal sacrifices."

Bradley's eyes widened as October came back and went to close the door when she looked up and saw him.

"Bradley?"

"Hi."

She looked around for a second. "What are you doing here?"

"Surprise!" he said fakely, waving his hands a little. "I'm your new house guest."

"Does my mother know about you being here?"

"Believe me, she knows."

October put her hand over her nose.

"Sorry, it's just that there's this horrid stench coming from in here. It doesn't bother you?"

"Yes, it does, but only if I move too quickly."

"What?"

"Unfortunately that stench is me."

October looked at him for a second and lifted an eyebrow.

"You don't look like someone who would miss a shower."

"Try eight. I've been trying to get this stink off of me ever since I got here and it still hasn't come off. It has something to do with being a ghoul…"

"Run that by me again?"

"A ghoul. Oh, super surprise, I am now a ghoul. I can't eat anything and I crave human flesh. So I guess you shouldn't get too close to me… then again, why would you? I smell like rotting flesh that's been sitting in the sun, right? No one would ever want to get close to me now…"

"Did you just say that you were a _ghoul_?"

"Yup."

"How…"

"Ask your crazy mom. She did this to me."

October seemed thoroughly surprised and nodded her head.

"Right…"

She left his room and went to find her mother.

* * *

"Mother? Mother, where are you?!"

"She's in the greenhouse." Joel said as he came around the corner. "The rose bush was getting full of roses so she went to cut the blooms off."

"I just saw Bradley and he's- he's-"

"A ghoul? Yes, I just got done berating your mother for that."

"Is that why there's blood on your sleeve?"

Joel looked at his long white sleeve and saw where blood was.

"Yes. She scratched me."

"Why would she do that?"

"She has some sort of plan up her sleeve but she won't reveal it to me. She asked Morticia to do it, not her, so maybe your Grandmama has more insight into the matter?"

"Is that why she told me not to be near him?"

"At that time he hadn't… feasted yet. He'll be fine for now but sooner or later he'll need another meal."

"And the stench?"

"I don't think there's anything we can do to help that. But he'll be staying with us in the meantime so that he won't cause any issues."

"And… where is he supposed to get his food from?"

"Well, there's plenty of graves and plenty of hobos."

October frowned and Joel put his hands on her shoulders.

"I can't tell you much more, honey. We'll just have to help him along."

October sighed. She was happy Bradley was staying but she didn't know how she was going to find his darkness again if he was a ghoul. Plus, getting close to him was almost impossible because he smelled like rotting flesh. Usually the stink isn't that bad, since Morticia sometimes forgets to use formaldehyde for the sacrifices to stay in place, but this was ten times worse than a dead cat. It was unbearable. She wished she knew why her mother thought this was a good punishment but then again, her mother was always like this. She just sighed and hoped Wednesday didn't try and get too carried away with anything else.

* * *

**kinda of a poor bradley thing but not really. he had it coming to him. what could end this horrible thing?**


	16. Love Is Strange

October put the last flower in and smiled, pulling back.

"There."

Bradley looked at her expectantly and she frowned, sniffing and putting her hand over her nose.

"Nope…"

"I told you it was useless. Besides, I didn't take you for the daisy chain type."

"Well, Mom always cuts the rose petals off the roses so I _thought_ maybe making you a necklace…"

"And potpourri and a head band and filling my pockets with petals and putting said petals in a good smelling oil… It's pretty useless, October. I smell like a dead opossum that got stuck in the air duct."

October didn't say anything since Eingelbert was the best at getting road kill into housing vents. Thing suddenly jumped on the bed and pulled on October's shirt. She looked over as he handed her a small vial that had a note wrapped around it.

"Thank you, Thing."

"What's that?"

"It looks like a note from Grandmama…" She unwrapped the vial and looked at the paper. "She says that this may help bring down the stench."

"Well, it's better than looking like a rose bush myself."

"If they were black, I think they would suit you."

Bradley smirked a little, taking the ring of roses from his head. It had been two weeks since his encounter with the wrath of Wednesday and he wasn't coming to grips with his newfound body but he was dealing with it as best as he allowed. The problem really wasn't eating flesh (although he wished he didn't; he wanted a cheeseburger _so_ bad), it was the stench he was always rolling off. Whatever clothes he had to wear were thrown away after a use and he preferred to stay in his room with the windows open to ventilate.

Every once in a while, October would come in and give him his assignments from school or try to talk with him. He had to get Thing to start writing down his stuff because apparently the stench carried onto the paper and October said her backpack smelled like rotten eggs the whole rest of the day. His mother called often and more and he assured her he was fine but was running out of excuses to not come home.

October handed him a small goblet.

"Here, I already poured it in. It said it would reduce it but I don't think it will be enough for regular people yet."

Bradley drank whatever was in the goblet and sighed.

"It tastes like ash." He grumbled.

"Right…"

"Is there _anything_ that I can taste that isn't a human body part? Like a secret taste bud that could be accessed?"

"I'm not sure-"

A loud gurgling sound erupted and Bradley put his hand over his stomach. He closed his eyes as if he were about to hurl but gripped the bed and breathed in. October watched him for a second and he seemed to level out.

"Are you alright?"

"No… I'm getting hungry again. Shit! This is pointless! What was the _point_ of turning me into this thing? Because she _could_?!"

"No, Mother isn't like that."

"I don't care what she is or isn't, I just know that she made me this thing and now I'm stuck here with you."

October was taken aback by him blaming his situation on her and looked away.

"Right… well, you're the one who tried to be friends with me originally so… It's only your fault."

She got off the bed and went to the door.

"I'll tell Mother that you're hungry again."

She left and Bradley crossed his arms angrily, throwing himself against the back of the bed. He'd done this more and more, trying to feel sorry for himself. He seemed to be the only one that would. Then again, October tried to help as much as she could… Bradley sighed, putting his head on the wall behind him.

"Out of all the people here, at least I can say that October has been the kindest. I know she's still weird but there she's better than the rest… I guess I should be thankful for that."

* * *

Wednesday watched Thing as he signed to her while she polished a knife. Once Thing was finished, he dropped over from signing letters so quickly, and Wednesday gave the tiniest of smirks.

"It seems our little ghoul is slowly coming around."

"Oh?" Joel said.

Wednesday turned and threw the knife, missing Joel's ear by millimeters.

"Missed." She grumbled as he reached back and removed the knife. "Thing says he seems to realize that October is the only one who will even try to feel sorry for the little Two Namer."

"_I_ feel sorry for him."

"What you think doesn't really matter."

"I've come to realize that over the years. I throw things out there just in case one day it does."

"That's what I like about you."

"Well, now there's something I don't hear every day: a compliment."

Wednesday threw another dagger and Joel caught it with his teeth. She frowned and he took it out, throwing it back. She moved over a little as it whizzed past her. Joel walked over and grabbed her, twirling her and then dunking her backward.

"We need to have a party soon. I miss your father's parties."

"He always did have the best."

"Although you're _mine_ now, so please stop dancing with Lumpy. It makes me insanely jealous. I go into a rage."

"Why do you think I do it?" she said with a lift of her eyebrow.

He brought her back up and they danced a small waltz in silence.

"I'm glad Father taught you how to dance. I don't know what I'd do without it." Wednesday said.

"Swing back and forth on Lumpy." Joel grumbled.

Wednesday purposely stepped on his feet but Joel was used to it and instead, took her along with him on his feet.

"Is this how he taught you?"

"Don't mock my father."

"I don't mock him at all, _cara mia_, I am inspired by him. He was a very interesting man and very persuasive with the ladies. I learned a lot from him."

"Yes, well, Tilda already has a husband. He lives in the black candle, so stop trying to woo her. Her husband is said to have murdered eight people before he was hanged. Tilda did love him dearly and she keeps the candle lit for his spirit… Your ugly eyes should only belong to me."

"They do and always will."

Someone cleared their throat and the two looked over, seeing Bradley in the doorway. Wednesday elbowed Joel in the stomach and walked over to the door, stopping at the stench.

"What."

"I… wanted to ask you a question."

"What?"

"Is there _anything_ that I can eat that will have a flavor? Garlic, chicken, bread… anything at all?"

"Do I not provide the best human parts for your appetite?"

"Not that I'm not grateful, truly, but I miss a sandwich or spaghetti or something."

"You should have thought of that before you decided to hurt October."

Bradley sighed and the rumbling noise came from his stomach again. He put his hand over his stomach and looked away.

"It seems it's time for another feeding. I will send Lurch for more supplies."

"I thought October told you."

"I haven't seen her today."

Bradley made a face, hoping she was alright.

* * *

October was with Eingelburt as he wrapped some thin wiring around the top of the roof.

"Octy?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you dating a zombie?"

"No. He's a ghoul but we're not dating. He hates me for what Mother did to him. Hold this." She said, handing him some wire cutters.

He held them as October grabbed an arrow for the crossbow and began to wrap the wire around the rod of the arrow.

"So he doesn't like our family?"

"I'm not sure. I know he hates Mother but Father tries to empathize with him and I think he appreciates that. I try to help but he doesn't want my company."

"Are we odd people?"

"To other people we are but they are odd to us. They don't seem to understand us."

"Oh… so is that why I got suspended for bringing a voodoo doll to school?"

"When did you do that?"

"A week ago. I wanted to use it on this girl and see if it worked, so I went to cut a piece of her hair off but the teacher caught me. Then she got mad at Father for not caring."

"Ah, well, the trick with voodoo dolls is that you have to get something a little more in depth. Like if she had had a cut or something, get her blood."

"Well I had asked to have her Band-aid but she said I was weird and ran away."

"I see…" October finished wrapping the arrow and put it in the crossbow. "Ready?"

Eingelburt nodded and she aimed the arrow for the swamp behind the house and shot it. It landed in the water where she wanted and she smiled.

"Wrap a wire from this to the railing wires."

He did what she asked as October began stripping the patches off of defibrillation wires and she wrapped them to the other wiring.

"So… why are you doing this?" Eingleburt asked.

"Well, there's nothing I can do for him physically so… I guess I want to help in another way. If we do this, the smell won't come from him, but from the swamp. Ready?"

"Yeah!"

"On three. One, two, three, CLEAR!" they both yelled as October hit the buttons to activate the defibrillator wires.

With the wrought iron railing and the extra wiring, plus the largeness of the particular kit she had bought, the electricity traveled down the wire to the arrow in the water, where it electrocuted the water. After a moment dozens of dead fish sprang up along with toads, eels, and something else.

"Alright, a body!" Eingelburt yelled as he looked through his binoculars. "Uncle Fester would love this!"

October pulled the binoculars away from him and looked out, seeing the carnage and smiled. In a few days, the stench would be more than Bradley's. _Maybe this will help him feel better._

* * *

**how best to comfort than by doing it in the most addamsy way. poor october is caught in her father's 'weak' heart and is trying to make bradley's life not that bad but bradley isn't cooperating. although he does feel bad about the comment he had made...**

**btw, tilda is the name i gave a member of the family who usually only comes during gatherings. i believe she was in the first movie only but she was wearing green and dancing with a candle which i think was a summoning candle of sorts. i just made a background story so... anyway. her names not really tilda.**


	17. Accept

**for some reason these keep being short but i'm not trying to do that, i promise - anyway, life lesson for the day kids**

* * *

"In other news, the town officials are still trying to figure out what the horrible smell is that is permeating the town. They'd looked everywhere and can't seem to find the source of the very noxious and rotten smell lingering in the town air."

Bradley turned off the TV and made a face at it, crossing his arms.

"Now I smell so bad that it's actually on the _news_? This is ridiculous!"

"Actually, this smell isn't you, Bradley." Joel said, walking into the room.

"Don't get close or you'll catch it."

"Actually, the outside smell is worse than you are."

Bradley thought for a second and realized that what he was smelling was in fact from outside, not himself.

"I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing."

"It depends on how you want to take it."

"I haven't seen October lately… is she okay?" Bradley asked, trying not to sound too concerned.

"She's been doing her school work and yours so she gets quite tired as of late. She hasn't eaten dinner in a long time due to the long hours."

"I never asked her to do my homework…"

Joel stuck the cigar in his mouth and Thing suddenly came out of nowhere to light a match for him.

"Thank you, Thing."

The hand bobbed up and down for a 'you're welcome' and scrambled out. Bradley would never get used to this house. The other day when he dared to venture into some other spaces in the house, he came across the library. There, he almost got eaten by a crocodile from **Peter Pan** and almost stabbed by a sword when he opened an encyclopedia. Plus, there were always booby traps everywhere and he almost got hit with an anvil if he hadn't been in a rush to get where he needed to go and avoided it.

"We are planning a party soon and I thought I would ask if you would like to join us."

"What does it matter?"

"Since you haven't been able to have a say in most of the matters involving our family, I thought this one could be completely voluntary."

Bradley liked the idea of going if he wanted to or not but he also like the idea of a party. He always liked parties. Then he thought about it and realized who he was talking to and made a face.

"Wait, what _kind_ of party? Are you going to bring over a bunch of KKK members and do a ceremony or something?"

"No, we don't deal with them anymore. The Addams' stopped that when they realized what they were and what they represented. Although the family doesn't really mind that sort of thing, they prefer equality. Everyone has the right to get killed and a group just can't pick and choose who they like. It lessens the diversity."

Bradley gaped at the man as he sent out of a stream of smoke.

"You people are psychotic."

"We prefer psycho_pathic_ but it's a common mistake."

"Whatever suffix is used, you guys are wicked crazy. Do you even hear yourselves when you talk?"

Joel sighed and sat on the bed next to Bradley.

"Kid, listen. You'll never figure this family out. You _have_ to go with the flow. They are happy to be different and odd and off-kilter. They believe in the dark arts and séances and witches. They believe in spells and are macabre to the nth degree, but that's what makes them Addams'. They like what they like and don't care what anyone thinks. They are the antitypical family and they _like_ it. They accept the deformed and strange and unfortunate. They _embrace _oddities.

"Ever wonder if regular people listen to _their_ selves? Think about the world we live in. They tell everyone to embrace everyone and yet they still are prejudice and racist. Everyone wants equality but don't at the same time. They want to be different but want to be accepted as well. They want freedom of speech but are limited to what they say and if someone doesn't like it, they get shut down. If the Addams' seem to be a little weird, so be it, but I think they are following the rules of society a hell of a lot better than society itself. They may think normal things are weird, but that's because to them, weird things are normal. _Someone_ has to take the outcasts in, don't you think?"

Bradley had to admit that Joel was right on a lot of things. The Addams' were pretty adaptable and strong and didn't care about what people thought of them. They were true to themselves and stuck by that. And yes, they were the pit for the outcasted but they accepted those that society didn't understand and made them feel like they were human, treated with respect.

Even in his predicament, the Addams' let Bradley stay and suffered the stench. Although he blamed Wednesday, he could tell the rest of the family was okay with it and tried to help him make the best of it. Especially October and her father. He was an outcast and this family made him try to feel normal.

"I guess you're right…"

"It's hard to figure out. I had the same problem. There's still some things I don't contend with, like séances, but I've learned to deal with things."

"How can you be married to that woman?"

"Because I love her and despite what she says or the way she acts, she loves me too. It's in a way only Wednesday understands but she has holes in her stoic nature that I've come to find and I see her heart."

"You're pretty patient then."

"Unbearably, but I like her happy and so I do what makes her so."

Bradley nodded and looked at Joel.

"Hey um, so what kind of party is it?"

"Lots of dancing and the whole family gets together. With the stench outside, no one will even notice you."

"Are you sure?"

"I can't smell a thing in here except the stench outside."

Bradley smiled and then looked away.

"Uh… I can't dance…"

"That doesn't surprise me."

* * *

Wednesday walked into October's room, finding her asleep on her desk. She shook her awake and she opened her eyes.

"Mother…"

"Would you mind telling me why there is a swamp full of dead fish and a dead body?"

"Oh, I thought I'd help Bradley out so he'd feel better…"

"You electrocuted the swamp then?"

"Yeah… Are you mad?"

"No, that was quite impressive. I thought maybe you and I could go fish out the dead body at least. These 'cops' don't seem to appreciate a dead body and what do we say about claiming death?"

"Be proud if you've done it but never accept someone else's handiwork."

"That's right. We don't want to take the credit of the death of that poor soul. It would be most unladylike."

October smiled and they went to the swamp.

* * *

**nothing like some mother-daughter bonding while fishing out a dead body. and bradley gets a small glimpse of what the addams' are really about.**

**it took a while to actually figure out what they are to society in general. they are antitypical but seem to convey typical things into their lives... they just do it better haha**

**also i don't condone the KKK, it's just a side joke**

**and there is a diff between psychotic and psychopathic. one is a danger to ones self due to brain issues the other is empathy and lack of care for people **


	18. Uninvited and Delicious

"Is this really necessary, Amanda?" Matthew asked as they pulled up into the long line of cars for the Addams' residence.

"Yes. One, we were not invited to this party, two, Bradley has been held hostage there for weeks now, three, well… those two are the only ones that matter."

"I find it funny that the invite part was first before our son… even though Bradley is perfectly safe."

"He's _not_ perfectly safe! If he were safe, then he'd be home! Those crazy lunatics have our son!"

"I'm pretty sure he would have come home if he could. Obviously something is keeping him here."

"Like a spell or death."

"Amanda, really…"

"Besides, have you seen the cars these people drive? Hearses and cars from asylums… it's like, like the monster mash or something."

"With Dracula and his son…" Matthew said in the accent of the singer of the song.

Amanda smacked his arm as Matthew chuckled.

"Lighten up, Mandy…"

"I told you never to use that phrase with me."

"Sorry."

Amanda shivered in her fur coat, trying to forget the image of almost being burned alive.

Matthew finally pulled around and rolled down the window where Lurch was and smiled.

"Evening. We're Bradley's parents. We didn't get an invite but we wanted to see our son. Can you let Mr. Addams know that we're here?"

Lurch moaned but gave an awkward nod.

"Great! Where we park?"

He pointed and Amanda made a face.

"I should have known…"

"It's not like ghosts will be there… Besides, it's a small cemetery."

"Does it matter how big it is or not? That's probably where this horrible smell is coming from that's permeated the city."

Matthew just sighed and drove to the cemetery.

* * *

Wednesday finished with October's hair and she turned to face her mother. Wednesday smiled.

"Perfection in the darkest form."

October blushed as Wednesday held up two tubes of lipstick.

"What color would you prefer?"

October looked at the two tubes, one a bright red like the way her grandmother used to accent her lips and one black on, the way her mother added to her pale features of a monochromatic tone. October made a face and then pointed to another tube on the vanity.

"I think I'll make my own color."

Wednesday nodded. "That will do just fine. Are you ready for the events of the night?"

"I think so… do you think Bradley is? I know he can't dance."

"That two-namer is none of our concern. If he screws up, it's on him. Besides, your father was… _kind_ enough to teach him the steps… Wasn't that thoughtful?" she said with a grimace.

Although October knew her mother didn't approve of Bradley, she really couldn't hate him for trying. He had become accustomed to his misfortune quite well and although he complained, he didn't try to escape or fake it. He must have finally learned from the last time that her mother's threats were nothing to be reckoned with. _That and she provides the food he needs…_

"Will you be serving stuff that Bradley can eat at the party?"

"Although I would like to, some people are greedy and would devour it all. I'm having to keep it in the wings so that he can slip out and grab something. Besides, I have a feeling that we will be entertained tonight by some uninvited guests…" Wednesday said as she glanced out the window. She saw Amanda and Matthew coming into the house and narrowed her eyes. "_Very_ uninvited…"

"Does this look alright?"

Wednesday turned back and looked at her daughter. She touched the waves of her hair one last time and crossed her arms.

"Like a black rose."

* * *

Amanda clung to Matthew like a vice as they entered into the house.

"May we take your coats?" a voice asked.

"Sure thing, thank-" Matthew stared at the two headed man who was holding out two arms from one side. "You… uh, thank you."

"No problem." They both said.

Matthew tried to get Amanda's coat off but she was too clingy to do it. He sighed and stopped short of stepping on the dwarf-girl. He looked around and had to admit that it was an odd bunch he was surrounded by. All sort of oddities and deformities were about but he had to say that a family that accepted this sort of thing so openly had to be commended.

"It's not so bad, Mandy. I mean, if you think about it, these people are pretty accommodating to things that our society makes fun of."

"Well then aren't they just the humanitarians of the year?" she spat. "It doesn't matter what they do or accept, we just need to find Bradley and get out of here."

"Hello."

Matthew turned and saw What standing behind him.

"Oh, hello…"

"I remember you two from dinner."

"Yes, uh… I'm Matthew Buckman and this is my wife, Amanda."

"Right! I'm What."

"Of course, right… it's nice to meet you again. Your father is excellent at fried rice."

"Yeah it's a specialty. Are you looking for Bradley?"

Amanda brightened. "Yes, we are."

"He's by the food table. You should take a taste of some lady's fingers. They're divine!"

"Don't you mean ladyfingers?"

"Tomato, tuh-mah-to…"

What left as Amanda made a face but finally let go of her husband.

"I'll go find him."

Matthew was happy to see her go and looked around. He kind of liked it here…

* * *

Bradley's stomach was rumbling and he grabbed hold of it. He needed to eat but he couldn't just leave… not until he saw October. He had been practicing the dance with her for a while now and it was nice that she could get near him without gagging or wanting to vomit. Feeling her touch him was exhilarating and for the first time, he felt alive. But that didn't help the gnawing feeling in his stomach.

"You know Wednesday put some in the hall." Joel said beside him.

"I want to see October first…"

"You won't be able to see anything but a massacre if you don't get some food in you. The dead are nice but we don't need you sniveling all over the place with your guilt."

Bradley made a face but went to find the flesh that Wednesday had stashed away.

As he headed to the hallways, he felt someone grab him and pull him away. When he whirled around, he found his mother staring at him in confusion.

"Mom?"

"Bradley… I… What _happened_ to you?"

"Why are you here?"

"We came to rescue you, your dad and I."

"I don't need to be rescued, I'm doing fine…"

"You don't look fine. What have they done to you?"

"It's nothing I can control… Mom, please leave me alone for a second, I have to go…" he said, trying to get away from his mother.

She grabbed a hold of him and he glared at her.

"Mom, let me go."

"Bradley, tell me what's going on. Tell me what they did to you."

His stomach rumbled loudly and he clenched his other hand over it. The cravings were getting harder and harder to bear and Bradley didn't want to take a chomp out of his mother, but if she didn't let him go…

"Mom, you have to let me go. If you don't then something bad could happen."

"That's what I'm afraid of! We came all this way-"

"I didn't ask you to do that, now did I? _Let_ me go."

Amanda slowly lifted her hand as Bradley pulled his arm away and went down the hallway. Worried, Amanda followed him and peeked around a corner as he stopped by a large bowl. She watched him as he lifted something out of it and began to devour it, making horrible noises. Amanda tried to get a little closer but tripped and fell flat on her face. Bradley turned to her as she sat up and they locked eyes with each other.

Amanda looked at the human leg in his hand as Bradley followed. They looked back at each other and she looked at the blood pooling from his mouth, to which Bradley slowly wiped away with his sleeve. She looked back at him and he swallowed, both in finishing his last bite and because of the fear of Amanda seeing him. Amanda opened her mouth to scream but Bradley jumped at her, putting his hand over her mouth.

"Don't. Scream… I can- Ah, shit…" he grumbled.

The stench from his skin had caused her to pass out and he sighed, looking around to figure out what to do. He pulled her to an empty chair and sat her in it, pushing her to lay against the back.

"I'll explain later, Mom… I'm so sorry you had to see that…"

He quickly finished his meal and went back to the party.

* * *

**haha well, at least amanda kinda knows now. whether she remembers is the kicker. this story is close to ending soon _ not much more to do.**


	19. Do You Seek Justice? - Denied

**enjoy this chapter cuz it was really fun to work with. the last half was exceptionally fun!**

* * *

October walked into the party along with her mother and the guests turned, oohing and ahing them as Joel met his wife at the end of the stairs. He held out his hand and she took it. He kissed it and then went up her arm to her neck but she stopped him and he trailed back down. Bradley tripped into the back of the crowd, blood all over his white shirt, and cursed at his luck. He decided to just make it a part of his outfit when he spotted October coming from the stairwell. He stopped and stared at her, taking in the sleek black dress and her long flowing black hair… and the dark green lipstick that he could see shimmering from where he was already. She was beautiful, a black rose shining in the moonlight of a werewolf's time.

He pushed through the crowd and met up with her at the end of the stairs. She looked at him and frowned.

"What happened to your shirt?"

"I… well… My mom's here and she saw me."

October looked around but didn't see his mother.

"I don't see her."

"She uh… she passed out."

"Oh."

"You look exquisite."

"Thank you. Despite the blood, you don't look half bad yourself."

"There you are. Your mother was- Woah, what happened?"

Bradley turned as Matthew looked at him as he held a smoking martini in his hand.

"Hey, Dad…" he said nervously.

Matthew smiled. "Marvelous party. Did you drink one of these things? It looks like they mixed Liquid Plumber in with a Rockstar and then put some dry ice in it! It's really interesting."

"It's Drain-O, Dad…" Bradley mumbled. "I wouldn't drink that if I were you."

"Nonsense, have all you like." Wednesday said, as rare light in her eyes.

"Oh, Mrs. Addams… I didn't see you there."

"I tend to blend in with shadows that accompany the blind space of the peripheral…" she said with a lift of her eyebrow, hoping he'd drink the drink.

"She means hello." Joel said with a roll of his eyes. "And we've seen you enough times for you to drop the Mr. and Mrs. act. It's just Joel and Wednesday, right Matt?"

"Sure thing."

"Bradley, where is your dear mother? I was hoping to sneak up on her soon."

"I'm afraid she's passed out in a chair back there. She followed me into the hallway and saw me eating. Then I had to cover her mouth and she passed out."

"Even better. If you don't see me for a while, don't be alarmed. At least not for _me_."

Wednesday walked away and left Bradley alone with October.

"I think I should be worried." He said with a slight smirk.

"Well with your father carrying a literal poisoned drink and your mother lying dormant to the wiles my mother will do to her, I'd say you should be."

Bradley thought about it for a moment and made a noise.

"Mmm, maybe. I'm sure they can handle themselves. Care for a drink?" he asked, holding his elbow out to her.

October smiled and walked with him to one of the long tables.

* * *

The party went well and having people around that didn't vomit or pass out while Bradley was around was nice. He took off his clothes and began to throw them in the trash can when a knock came at his door. He told them to come in and Matthew walked in.

"Hey, are you going to stay here forever?"

Bradley thought about that question for just a moment.

"Until I get things sorted out…"

"Look, son, I don't care what you do and what friends you've got (as long as it's not drugs and sex and your friends aren't dildos) but it's been a while. Your mother worries about you all the time, _especially_ since you're here. Do you plan on coming home soon?"

"Like I said, as soon as I get things sorted out."

"What things?"

Bradley looked away. "You wouldn't understand."

"I'm sure I could if you explained it to me."

"That's just it, it's hard to explain."

"You know what's hard to explain? How you forget a whole girl is in your cake and you bake her right in. Bake her right in! How in the world is the whole cake gonna fit in the oven and then how can you forget she's in there?"

"What?" Bradley asked in confusion.

"That bald guy with no neck-"

"Fester or Pugsley?"

"The one who was married once before."

"Oh, Fester…"

"Yeah, he was telling us about some good times with October's grandfather, Gomez, and recounted that experience to us."

"And you were disgusted?"

"I was confused. Like I said, how do you forget she's there?"

Bradley was surprised at his father. Both of his parents were rich kids with spoiled childhoods and adult egos. He had thought that neither of them cared too much about fantasy things and the like, but his father was somehow becoming accustomed quite easily.

"So you… weren't disgusted?"

"No… Either way, we want you to come home because we miss you."

"I miss you guys too but I just can't come back yet."

"Son… come on…"

Bradley made a face as he thought about it. He sighed and decided to just come out and say it.

"They turned me into a ghoul."

"A wha?"

"A ghoul. It's this thing that craves human flesh and can eat nothing else. I also smell like the back end of a constipated rhino all the time/Death. Everything I eat tastes like ash and drinks are the same. The only thing that has any flavor is… is human flesh. I'm supposed to somehow break this curse on myself and Wednesday said I should figure it out. But I haven't… so until I get back to normal, I'm staying here. Besides, Wednesday provides me with the uh… _meals_ I need in order not to go on a rampage and eat whatever comes along."

"So you're a zombie?"

"No, a ghoul. Dad, pay attention."

"I am."

"No you're not. You're just saying that."

"Truthfully son, I really don't know what to say. I want to say that your mind is getting taken over by these people's antics, but these people are a different type of breed. Wednesday doesn't seem to let anything slip passed her cracks and Joel tries to stay oblivious to everything to keep the peace. Besides, that Grandmama looks really suspicious."

Bradley looked over and saw Morticia in the corner.

"Right…"

"Either way, whatever is keeping you here, being a ghoul or whatever it is, then that's fine. Just text us or give us a call every once in a while to let us know you're alright, okay?"

Bradley nodded, a little astonished his father was so lenient.

"Now, I need to find your mother before she gets herself lost."

He shut the door as Bradley watched after him. He had to give his father credit for being so cool with everything. _Then again, he probably drank that weird drink and is actually having an acid trip._ he thought.

* * *

Amanda opened her eyes and looked around a little. She was a little groggy and tried to pull herself up but was kept from doing so. She looked and found that she was tied to a table and she began to panic.

"People never believe me when I say things about them." She heard from her right.

She looked over and saw Wednesday sitting in a wing backed chair wearing a black tight fitting dress with a plunging neckline that tapered all the way to the top of her stomach. Amanda made a face at that.

"Are those supposed to intimidate me?" she said, looking at Wednesday's breasts, which were having trouble staying concealed from the plunging neckline.

Wednesday looked down and lifted an eyebrow.

"Well… at least mine are real."

Amanda scowled. "What do you want, you freak?" She then remembered seeing Bradley and gasped. "And what did you do to my son?!"

"Far less damage than he did to my daughter."

"Why am I here?"

"Because you snuck into a party uninvited…"

"Not that!"

"I told you when we were at Camp Chippewa that you would be a victim all your life… I'm just making true on the problem."

Amanda's blue eyes widened. "Are you going to kill me?"

"What's the fun in that?"

"I don't _know_! What's the fun in anything that you demented people do?! What could possibly possess a person to want to burn a camp to the ground just because they want them to be happy?! What makes a twelve-year-old girl want to _burn_ someone because they pissed them off?! You people are completely out of your minds!"

"Don't stop your compliments now…" Wednesday said, leaning on her hand. "I was beginning to actually like you for a moment."

"I give up!"

"That doesn't really surprise me. Bradley must get his determination from his father."

"What do you want with me?!" Amanda screamed.

"Mandy? Yoo hoo…" Matthew said, opening the door.

Amanda looked over at Matthew as he blinked at her and she sighed in relief.

"What are you doing?" he asked her.

"What am I- What the hell does it look like?! I'm being held hostage!"

Matthew looked at Wednesday who only stared back at him. He shook his head and walked over to where Amanda was, beginning to untie the ropes.

"This is no time to fool around." He mumbled.

"What is wrong with you? You see I'm tied up like I'm about to be sacrificed or pulled apart like the rack and you say I'm fooling around?!" She gasped and looked at Wednesday. "You gave him something didn't you?"

"Whatever do you mean?"

"You gave him something to make him oblivious to your antics just like you turned my son into a zombie."

"A ghoul, sweetheart." Matthew corrected.

"WHATEVER?!"

She wrangled her hands and feet out of the ropes and stood up, pointing at Wednesday.

"I'm going to call the cops on you! I'm going to have them come and investigate this whole house. Come on, Matt!"

She grabbed her husband and tromped out of the house.

Wednesday looked at Thing, who had lit on her shoulder.

"How delightful…"

* * *

The administrator stared at Amanda for a moment.

"So… what's the problem?" she asked.

"What do you mean 'what's the problem'?! I _told_ you what the problem was!"

The woman looked at her notepad and lifted an eyebrow at Matthew. He didn't say anything and she looked it again.

"Can you run through it one more time so I can make sure I got everything?"

Amanda pointed at her. "You're mocking me aren't you," she looked at her name tag. "_Betty_."

"I'm only doing my job, ma'am."

Amanda grabbed her hair in her hands.

"Has the whole world gone crazy?!" she yelled, making some of the staff look at her for a moment. "I demand justice! My son is in their home attending lavish and yet somehow quite macabre parties!"

"Got that." The woman said, checking it off.

"He stays there because he wants to!"

"Yup."

"He doesn't even want to spend time with us, his parents!"

"That's a shame…" the woman said dryly, writing that down.

"You must do something! I mean, they even eat dinner together at the same table!"

"Eat dinner… together… at… table… Alright, anything else?" the woman said, looking at her.

Amanda's face went red and she made a scoffing noise, pushing the bucket of pens off of Betty's desk and slammed her hands on the desk.

"You _have_ to do something about them! Those people!"

"Who?"

"The Addams'!"

"What about them?"

"They have my son!"

"Who… is there because he wants to be." Betty said pointing at that on the notepad.

"They've turned him into something that makes him eat human flesh!"

Betty blinked. "I see… Wi…zards…" she wrote and spoke.

"You take me for a fool!" Amanda yelled, throwing her hands in the air. "Betty, the receptionist, takes _me_, Amanda Buckman-Smythe –the inspiration of that horrid book about the pilgrim Sarah Miller- like a complete fool! I seek justice- DENIED! My son is hostage in that house, turned into a creature who eats human flesh and enjoys it! The devil's wife resides in that home and no one will do anything about it?!"

"I'm… going to see what I can do about this. Hold on a moment."

Amanda sighed as Matthew grabbed her hand.

"You've had your fun now. She's about to get your ass arrested." He grumbled, pulling his wife out of the police station.

"What- but… wait!"

"Amanda, go take about four Xanex when we get home. Seriously. You've had your fun, now stop it and leave the kid alone."

"But he's not there because he wants to be… he's there because he has to be."

"Which is kind of the same thing. Believe me. He's fine."

Amanda just let her husband drag her to the car and left before the police could get a hold of her.

* * *

**just to mention, wenz was actually going to do something with her but before she could get her teasing done, matt came in. and the police scene is one of my favorites in AFV besides the camp ones so it was a blast to be able to slightly recreate it**

_**ps: t****o the guest that has been commenting on my other stories in regards to this one: STOP. it is rude and very annoying. if you would like more from this story, comment on THIS story only. i have many stories that i work on (30 to be exact) so this is one of the many that gets thrown into the mix. there are other fandoms with other fans who would like to have their favorite stories worked on too.**_

**_i'm not trying to be a bitch about it, it's just a pet peeve of mine. thank you._  
**


	20. One Sarcophagus, For The Little Goth

**so i don't think eingelburt and bradley actually officially met in the previous chapters so... yeah... if they did then whoops, retcon fail XP  
**

* * *

"Well, the party was a complete success." Joel said, walking up behind Wednesday as they watched the party guests leaving from the top of the stairs.

"Almost."

"Oh?"

"I didn't get to do what I wanted to Amanda… shame really…"

"And the kids didn't get to dance. They always missed an opportunity."

Wednesday made an agreeing noise as she walked down the stairs and towards the ballroom. As she got to the door, she stopped, hearing voices.

"You're looking down. You need to look at me and lead."

"It's harder with no music."

"All music comes in 4s, 8s, and 16s. That's why when people dance they say 'I, 2, 3'."

"Then wouldn't it be in 3s, 6s, and 9s?"

"No, the four is silent."

"Like the double L in guillotine?"

"Hmm, good choice. I would have used the K in knife."

"Such a boring analogy… not enough flair."

A laugh rang out and Wednesday actually felt like her heart was beating for the first time. She hated it, but for now it was a good feeling. Seeing her daughter happy was priority, even if it _was_ with Bradley. She felt Joel behind her and he chuckled.

"Well, I take back my earlier words. It looks like they got to dance after all."

"The smell will start to go down now." She said, walking away.

Joel walked after her.

"How do you mean?"

"Just what I said. I guess it's time we fish out the rotting corpses in the swamp. Even _I'm_ getting a little sick from the stench."

"Wednesday-"

"Don't wonder about me, Joel, be scared of me. You're best when you're frightened… or tied up. Both is preferable."

Joel smiled wickedly and gave a growl as he overtook her and swept her off her feet.

"_Cara mia_!"

"Put me down."

"No."

Wednesday lifted an eyebrow. "You're being so disobedient."

"I am a bad boy tonight."

"You should be punished."

"I think so…"

"Shall I get the whip?"

"I was thinking a riding crop. A little horse play…"

"I'll get the bridle."

* * *

A couple days later, the smell that seemed to permeate the city was gone but Bradley noticed that his own stench wasn't as bad as it used to be. Either it was because everyone's noses were used to the other smell now or what, but it was nice to have some contact with people again. He actually ate breakfast with the Addams' for the first time since his stay.

He walked down the stairs towards the kitchen when he almost tripped over Eingelburt.

"Sorry…" he said.

Eingelburt looked at him and turned his head at him.

"I've never seen you before. Are you from the party?"

Bradley frowned. "I've been here for months… I'm Bradley, October's friend?"

Eingelburt turned his head. "Oh… Then why haven't I seen you? I sneak around this house all the time."

"I've been hiding out in my room. Your mom turned me into a ghoul and my skin smells like dead flesh so I've been too antisocial to go out…"

"You're a ghoul?!" he asked, his wide blue eyes looking at Bradley with wonder and fascination.

"Yeah."

"So you eat human flesh?"

"Yes."

"_Wow_!"

Bradley chuckled nervously when it dawned on him that he really didn't know who this kid was either. Or rather, he didn't remember.

"Who are you again?"

"I'm Octy's brother, Eingelburt!"

Bradley turned his head. _Eingelburt? God, the names this family comes up with…_ Eingelburt suddenly grabbed Bradley's hand and pulled him along.

"Come on, we're having breakfast in the kitchen this time. Grandmama is cooking and maybe Mother has some flesh for you! I want to see you eat it…"

"Hey, if you hold my hand it will smell like dead flesh for like three days." Bradley said, trying to get his hand from Eingelburt's.

He turned around and gave an impish grin to Bradley.

"Rotting corpses have the best smell in the world. They are a cross between death and life, a sickly sweet smell that can only be made on the cusps of the dying."

Bradley frowned. "I'm pretty sure I'm past rotting and into total decomp."

"Nope. You smell like you're heading the right direction." He tugged Bradley along some more. "Death is always the best direction and you're lucky! You get to smell like Death and yet still be alive! When I grow up, I want to be just like you."

"You just keep hoping, kid…" Bradley grumbled.

* * *

October sighed, playing with her food so that she could eat. The party was so nice and Bradley had looked so handsome. And even afterwards, when he came back down in regular clothes, the stench of the rotting swamp overpowered Bradley's and she couldn't smell him at all. Even though they didn't get to dance properly, playing around in the empty ballroom and dancing to their own beat was just as fun. She wished that Bradley wasn't technically forced to stay with them because of her mother and that he really wanted to be there with them.

"Mother, look what I found!"

Everyone looked as Bradley was pulled in and Wednesday lifted an eyebrow.

"You're here." She said stoically.

"Yeah… uh… is that alright? I mean…"

"Of course." Joel said, drinking something from a mug.

Bradley learned not to take what he thought were normal things for granted. For instance, Joel was reading the newspaper and drinking out of a mug like Bradley had seen his own father do. But he knew not to be fooled by the appearance. Matt would be drinking coffee and reading up on sports. Joel was probably drinking something toxic and looking too intently in the obituaries.

Joel put the newspaper down and looked at Bradley as he sat down next to Eingelburt, who had decided that Bradley was his new friend.

"Your smell has gone down significantly."

"I wasn't sure if it was just everyone used to whatever that smell was or if it was truly easing up."

October sniffed. "You smell like freshly dead instead."

"It's great!" Eingelburt said.

"Breakfast is ready! Sorry, child, I don't have any body parts left over or I would have made you something." Morticia said as she came over to the table.

"I'm alright, thank you, Mama Addams."

The glass suddenly broke and an arrow shot through and landed on the other side of the kitchen. Joel just smiled.

"Pubert's here."

"Lurch, go let that cretin in before he sends another arrow in. I'm sure it will have flames on it the second time."

Lurch nodded and left as Wednesday looked at Bradley. He was looking at her son as he spoke to him and smiling slightly. She wasn't sure about this boy now… could this have taken a different turn than she expected?

"Mother, I want to turn into a ghoul like Bradley."

"I'll see about it when you're older." She said, grabbing her glass of water. "Until then you will have to eat what everyone else does and smell like the living."

"Can I not shower for a while?"

"The smell is completely different, Bert. Body odor and rotting flesh are completely different smells, dummy." October said with a roll of her eyes.

Bradley didn't really know what was going on when his stomach rumbled. He looked down and put his hand over his stomach. Wednesday lifted an eyebrow at him.

"It seems you are hungry as well."

"I'll manage, don't mind me."

"Don't you have a time limit or something?" October asked.

"Yeah-"

"Sister, marvelous news." Pubert said, walking into the kitchen.

"You're dying?" she asked, looking expectant.

"Not yet, I'm afraid. I just heard that they are having one of those auctions for orphans and widows at the antique shop."

"Really? How much are they going for? I need an orphaned child for a spell…" Morticia said.

"Mother, it's that silly named charity thing where they actually _help_ those types of people."

"I always get that mixed up."

"Either way, I hear that they are selling some cursed jewelry and a sarcophagus."

For the first time since Bradley had known Wednesday her eyes lit up like a child's and she stood up, putting her hands on Pubert's shoulders.

"Tell me it isn't true."

"It's true! I saw them unloading it when I was pied piping some rats towards the orthodontist's office."

Wednesday looked at Joel expectantly.

"Joel, I want that sarcophagus. It's what I've always dreamed of having."

"Then you won't be able to sleep with me in the bed. How will that benefit us?"

"I can make you sleep in it, lock it, and happily hope you die during the night and then be slightly happy that you're alive in the morning. Besides, I've always wanted to sleep in one since I was a little girl. Father said I would get spoiled if I got one though…"

"When is the auction, Pu?" Joel asked.

"In about two days."

"What if there was a _mummy_ inside of it?!" Eingelburt said excitedly.

"That would make things better."

Bradley felt his stomach rumble again and moaned. He got up and headed into the hallway, gripping his shirt. The cravings were coming and they would only get stronger. _I have to eat… I'm so hungry…_

* * *

Amanda drummed her fingers on the table as the cashier rung up the last item.

"That'll be $108.32… So, you going climbing or something?"

Amanda handed him her credit card. "Something."

"A lot of rope you got there. I've always wanted to do a little climbing myself."

"Mmmhmm…" she said, signing her name.

"I noticed her didn't buy any carabiners though… uh… are you spelunking?"

Amanda put the card back into her bag and grabbed the rope and bag.

"Nope, just rescuing my son."

She whistled happily as she walked out of the hardware store.

* * *

**oh no, what is amanda going to try and do now? can't she take a hint?**

**and yay, bradley's smell seems to have trickled to slightly dead now, although he cravings are still high. will he get somethign in time?**

**and i figured wednesday would have loved to have had a sarcophagus just due to the way she sleeps with her arms crossed like an egyptian pharaoh**


End file.
